July 19, 2017 Wednesday Morning

Been quite a while since I posted.  Went for my six month HIV appointment the other day.  Got my latest test results which were a little disappointing.  My CD4 count went down a lot which we did expect to some point since the previous number was so high, but was not happy with the percent of good cells going down also.  Hopefully it was just an 'off' day for me to have the blood test.

Life just keeps rolling along.  It is a very hot humid day today in Milwaukee.  I am not fond of hot and humid.  I am having lunch today with my neighbor that moved from across the alley 2 years ago.  We have been good about meeting once a month for lunch and I do look forward to our lunches together.  I feel good physically and am trying to by positive mentally.  Some days are easier than others.

We are up to seven dogs now.  Yes, seven.  Tony watched a beagle pug mix get hit by a car near his shop and after rescuing it no one came forward to claim her.  She is so sweet and get along with everyone so we decided to keep her.  Here is a picture of our current gang:

Vito has had his ups and downs the last few months but seems to be happy to keep enjoying life.  He still enjoys going out daily for a short sniff and walk in the alley.  I am able to walk the new Beagle (Lucky) along with Bo and Casper all together.  I still am working on Armani and Toby when it comes to walking.  I do love my dogs.

The Summer is going by so damn fast.  Every day and week for that matter seems to.  I blink and another week has gone by.  I still am taking my anti depressant and seems to be doing what it should.  Do not find myself crying during the day like I was prior to starting it.  Walking the dogs daily really has keep my healthy physically and mentally.  I keep thinking of my grandma that lived to 98 because she walked daily.

I still think of death and dying.  Having another young friend die a couple weeks ago at 43 yrs old hasn't helped.  I still am searching for the answers to life.  Tony and I are doing OK.

Hope you all are enjoying your Summer.  Thought it good to check in and let you know I am still alive and feeling good.  Feel like I am in a good spot in life right now.

March 28, 2017 Tuesday Morning

Hello.  It has been a while since I posted.  I did update my blood results from my January visit with my HIV doctor.  Actually got my best numbers yet with that visit.  Life seems to go so fast that I blink and another day has gone by.  Let me try to update what has been happening in the first few months of this year:
I still am taking the anti depressant Velafaxine.  I honestly hate taking an anti depressant and am not happy with the very vivid dreams I have on this drug.  It is like when I was on Atripla which I had to stop taking due to the dreams.  I wake up yelling.  Always a dream in turmoil.  My doctor even had me switch when I take the meds and it has not helped with the dreams.  I see my doctor for my anti depressants again in April and will address this then again.  Other that the dreams the meds seem to get me out of the 'dark' or 'sad' times I feel at times.

I stayed in therapy for the month of January.  February came and I ended up stopping my visits with this case worker / therapist.  It was due to a combination of things.  One being the weather in February was the warmest on record here for that month.  I spent a lot of time outside with the dogs walking and training.  Vito continues to go on 'carry walks'.  The other being the fact I just wasn't getting anything out of the visits.  The last straw was when the therapist was yawning while I talked.  I felt like I was boring her with my petty problems.  There are only two therapists and the other I do not like much either.  Will see how life goes but for now I am done with therapy.

Healthwise, by the middle of February I got a sinus infection.  I get these infections twice a year and it is usually the end of March and October.  I think the warm weather brought allergy season earlier than in the past.  By the first week of March I was seeing my doctor for the sinus pain.  Got an antibiotic and was told to see an Ear Nose and Throat Specialist.  Last week the ENT speciallist told me I have TMJ Pain and to see my dentist.  Was even given a brochure on it because I thought he was joking.  I have a dentist appointment on the calendar for middle of April.  Two weeks ago my teeth ached so bad for three days I could not eat cold or hot food or drink.  Anything I ate sent me to the floor in pain.  I still don't know what that was all about but am so glad it stopped.  Why can't life be pain free?

Last Friday afternoon I was taking a nap with the dogs and heard Vito hit the floor.  Fell off the bed.  I have a very secure area for him to sleep on and he is usually very good about staying in that area.  Got to him on the floor in pain with his left paw in the air.  FUCK!   Poor guy.  Being blind must just suck.  Spent all last weekend carrying him out and holding him to relieve himself.  He can not put any weight on the foot.  Took him to the vet yesterday and the doctor says she does not think he broke anything but will take a long time to heal.  Will have to carry him EVERYWHERE for a while.  Thankfully being blind for as long as he has been, and his other leg injury, he is not very mobile and has learned to listen to me and work with me with all his needs.  Also set up an appointment for him for next week to have a glucose curve done on him to see how his Insulin levels are doing.  It has been a while since we had these levels checked due to the cost, but it is time if I want to be a good dad.  Vito will be 15 in July.

The other five dogs are doing great.  Rose still goes to work with Tony daily and is waiting at the back door to leave with him.  Rose loves going to work with Tony and when she is there taking his brother Tom, who works there, for a morning walk.

So other than life's stumbling blocks and the aches and pains of old age and HIV, I am still alive and kicking.  I am looking forward to Summer.  I should say Spring because Summer gets too hot.  I like Spring and Fall best.

Vito is whining on his pillow so best to get back to attending him.