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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

September 29, 2009 Tuesday Night

Forgot my meds last night before bed for the first time.

Monday I went to work all day with my tenant. Worked my butt off and got home around 4:30 PM. By the time I got the dogs and house settled, then fed I was once again out the door to go to a meeting on HIV that started at 6 PM. Prior to my meeting Tony and I had to have a talk about his doctor visit today to a doctor regarding his testicles. He has always had a growth or what I would call 'not normal balls'. His one testicle is bigger than the other and you can't even feel the ball there is so much 'something' around it. Well, he goes in for surgery a week from Friday. He might even have to get a vasectomy at the same time depending on what they find. He will be down for a while he is told after the surgery for at least 3 to 5 days. Then no lifting and such for a couple weeks. So, here we go again. Went to my meeting. I was so proud telling everyone that since January I have not missed one dose or time taking my HIV meds. I usually take them at 10 PM prior to going to bed. By the time I got back from the meeting and watched a little TV we went to bed to watch the last show that started at 9PM. Turned off the TV shortly after the news started at 10 PM and went to bed. Did not sleep well. About 4 AM I got up and walked into the kitchen. Something made me look down at my pill container. Damn It! I screamed. My pills for that night were still in the pill container. I took them immediately. I was so mad at myself. I had done so well. I am told there is about a 2 hour window. The key is never to go below 95% compliance. So now that I feel I f#cked up I can never forget again. It bothered me so much I could not fall back to sleep and got up by 6 AM and just started my day. Got to work by 9 AM. Was very frustrated by 12:30 when I realized most of the day was over and I still had not accomplished what I wanted. The time goes so damn fast doing the work I am doing. I honestly blink and I have to end my day. I try to work 9 - 3, six hours. I don't want to over do it. I have found myself working until 4 PM a couple days because the day has just gotten away from me. I guess this is all good. Dropped off the tenant at the house and drove to the vet to get more special food for Barkley, and some more shampoo for his sores. Pulling into the garage I hit the side of it and made a big dent in the Mustang, the car we are trying to sell. Damn it. I was mad at myself but when I called Tony I reminded him he can not say much since he did the exact same thing to our.........65 Cadillac Convertible on Sunday pulling that back into our garage. Jeez. I always hate pulling the car into the garage with that huge Cadillac in it. I stay far away and have to back in, hence hitting the side of the garage on the passenger side. So, now I am done for the day. Put a frozen pizza in the oven and going to make a stiff drink. Actually I already am drinking that stiff drink. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

September 27, 2009 Sunday Night

Sunday morning I was up by 7 AM. After feeding the dogs, reading the Sunday Milwaukee Journal, and feeding the pond fish and picking up the dog dropping outside ... I made breakfast. Used up the last of the eggs and made french toast. Spent the morning walking each of the dogs around the block, except Stella. She is not ready for a walk yet. She does now have full run of the house and furniture. We do not let her outside yet without a leash because if someone walks by out front she goes nuts in the Volkswagen dogie window that the dogs can see through in the front fence. So we still are keeping her confined for another week. Maybe by next weekend I will be able to take her up the alley and back. She is starting to put some weight on the foot. Using it every once in a while. I am happy with the progress. She goes in Friday to get the stitches taken out. After the dogs were walked Tony and I took a drive in the 1965 Cadillac along the Milwaukee lakefront. We picked up some chicken noodle soup for his mom who is sick, and dropped it off at her home. We then went back to the lakefront and hiked down the paths and hills to the water. Quite a climb down as well as back up for an old guy like me. I was out of breath when we finally climbed the slippery slopes / cliffs back to the top. Tony slipped going down once and got mud all over the back of his clothes. We had fun. I like fall best of all seasons. The leaves are falling from the trees, you can hear them rustling on the ground, and it is cool during the day, and even cooler at night. Was a great hike through the woods and to the lakefront today. I hope to do more of that before it gets to cold. I think it is so peaceful in the woods in the fall, watching nature. After we got home we made burgers on the grill and now have settled in for the night of watching TV. Desperate Housewives and Brothers and Sister will get watched. I will DVR Cold Case and Amazing Race.

Planning on working all this week, Monday through Thursday. Monday night I have a dinner meeting starting off an 8 month once a month meeting about HIV. I got in at the tail end of last years series of meetings. I want to catch them from the start this time around. It includes and nice dinner and who know who I might meet. Much less the information is always very important if I want to survive. Hope to write again by Tuesday night.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

September 26, 2009 Saturday Night

Rough night last night.

Had a great lunch with the guys. Since two of them have been keeping my Mustang in their front yard to try to sell it in Racine, and the fact Tony had someone wanting to look at it on Saturday. We planned to meet them at their house Friday night in Racine and go out for dinner. After dinner Tony and I drove the separate cars home. I had deep fried shrimp for dinner.

This morning at 5 AM I woke up not feeling well at all. Made it to the toilet not knowing what I should deal with first, didnt know if I shoud shit or puck. Ended up switching off doing both for about a half hour. Shrimp do not taste good coming up. At one point I thought I was dieing. Must have been bad shrimp. Got back to bed about an hour later and slept until about 10 AM this morning. The dogs actually let me sleep in today. Spent the day just laying around the house watching a marathon of True Stories of Hollywood Husbands (or something like that). It was quite addicting to watch one half hour after another. Finally showered and went out to dinner at a local Italian restaurant down the street. Ate light, not knowing how food would feel, my less Italian food. Tonight we have just been watching TV and I have been writing back and forth to a High School buddy. His life makes my life seem good in comparison. Sunday we have no plans, good thing. Looking forward to laying around the house another day re cooperating.

Friday, September 25, 2009

September 25, 2009 Friday Morning

Gotta type fast since Tony will be home soon to take us to lunch with the guys. Wanted to get a quick post online.

Wednesday I worked all day again at the North location continuing to set up the warehouse. Wednesday night we went out for burgers and then stayed home and watched more of the new TV season with the DVR recording away all the other shows on different channels.

Thursday morning I had to go to Columbia St Marys hospital for my scheduled bone density scan, chest xray and hip xray. The chest xray was at my doctor's request. The other two were due to my request and interest. Got a call late yesterday that all the xrays and tests came back great. That is a relief. Guess the pain I feel is just old age and working hard. Got a chance to clean the house before leaving for a Board meeting at ARCW for the afternoon. Cleaned the house changing the set up with Stella's recovery. Now the furniture is fenced off but she has more run of the house. She is not allowed outside without a leash still and most rooms have gates at the doorways to keep her out. But she has much more room to move around and is much happier. Last night Tony let her sleep on the couch with him while we watched TV. The show Flash Forward was very good. Wonder how they will keep it up now. It is on again tonight and I recommend it. Now it seems we are in the cage with the furniture all blocked off and fenced in. Thursday night I got an email from a high school friend. Our 30th reunion is coming up November 7th. I have never been to one yet and debated about going to this one. I did not like high school much and do not have fond memories of it. I did buy tickets yesterday for Tony and I to attend. The email I received from my high school buddy was sincere and I spent this morning responding. I had not told him or my high school people I am gay. I crossed them all off my list of life shortly after leaving high school and in college. Wasn't worth it being such a red neck town that I was raised in. Should be interesting to get his response since I dated his cousin, yes a girl for 2 years in high school. Will they be shocked? Accepting? I will let you know. Briefly told him about my life but did not go into specifics when it comes to my HIV / AIDS.

Showered and ready for Tony to come get me for lunch. I might do some mixing of music this afternoon. I do have some things that should get done, but they can wait. I think I will make it a 'Dave day' and mix music this afternoon.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

September 22, 2009 Tuesday Night

Worked all day Monday. Had Tony come home around lunch to look in on Stella and make sure her and the rest of the dogs were ok. She was so happy to see me when I walked in the door around 4 PM. She knows I am the daddy who comforts her pain. Made a premade meatloaf, corn on the cob and some bread for dinner. Went to bed around 9 PM with Stella on the bed between Tony and I so she doesn't leave the bed during the night without waking one of us to help her off the bed or pick her up. She is still being very good. She now can walk outside on three legs and pee and poop on her own. I don't have to make a sling and help hold her up. She is starting to put some weight on her foot which is good, just not too much. She is sleeping right now in her enclosure. Last night we watched the beginning of Dancing With The Stars and then Castle. Had to DVR the CBS line up.

Today was much the same as yesterday but worked an hour longer. Very exhausted and looking forward to going to bed soon to watch The Good Wife and then go to bed. Watching tonight's Dancing With The Stars right now. Stella is still doing good. I am so proud of my baby.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

September 20, 2009 Sunday Noonish

Tony and I spent all day Saturday with the blinds closed, curtains closed, and watched TV with Stella. She was good all day. She didn't go want to go out to pee until about 5 pm after dinner which had me a little nervous. But after she ate dinner we put her on a leash and she walked outside on three legs as I used a towel as a sling to help hold her up as she walked. She then was exhausted and spent the night sleeping next to me on the floor in the living room. Watched 'I Love You, Man' with Paul Rudd. Was a very good movie. I recommend it. After that is was a bunch of horror flicks on Syfy Channel.

Today Stella had a little more energy. After breakfast she walked outside with my help once to pee and then again to poop. That first poop is always the hardest after surgery as we all know. I had to help hold her butt up as she did her business. Walked her back inside and a little while she wanted to go out again. Found out she just wanted to lay outside for a while which we let her do, on a leash so not to run or try to walk. She is now sleeping again in the living room and exhausted. Did a quick drive to the grocery store this morning while Tony watch her and stayed with her. Spending the afternoon clearing the DVR with old shows so we have room for the new season of shows to begin this week and a lot of taping of the over lapping shows. Looking forward to the award show with Neil Patrick Harris tonight.

Friday, September 18, 2009

September 18, 2009 Friday Early Evening

Stella was picked up at the vet and home by 11 AM this morning. She is being such a good girl. Her brothers and sisters are also being very good. I spent the afternoon napping on the floor with her. She couldn't snuggle close enough to me as we slept. I attached two pictures. One is of the stitches on her knee and the other is a picture of Kali laying next to her to comfort her.

September 18, 2009 Friday Morning

The vet called yesterday at lunch and then I talked with them again later in the day. Stella made it through her knee surgery ok. By the second time I talked with the vet they had already gotten her outside once to go to the bathroom and she had eaten a little food. I did not sleep well last night and was up by 4:30 AM this morning because I missed her so much. I hated leaving her for the night. Especially since no one is there anyway to keep an eye on her. I just don't see the point. Either way after a roofer shows up in a bit to give us another roof estimate we will be off to the vet to get her. I have the living room all set up so I can spend the weekend with her and sleep in the living room with her. She can only walk to go out to go to the bathroom. No other movement this weekend. I can't wait to get her. Poor girl. I will write on her progress.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

September 16, 2009 Wednesday Dinner Time

The Pet Shop Boys concert last night was Absolutely Fabulous.

Monday we watched our usual CBS lineup on TV. Went to bed about 10:30. We did watch Jay Leno at it's new time. Was a good show Monday night. So I guess we did deviate from our usual TV viewing.

Tuesday I worked another 9-3 shift working at the warehouse with my tenant. He is a good worker and honestly keeps up with me which is not easy to do. I can be quite intense when I work. My thought is..........get it done and get home. So I work fast and do it right the first time and call it a day. My kind of work. Last night was the Pet Shop Boys concert. WOW. I have to say this was the BEST concert I have ever seen. BEST. Prior to leaving for the concert Tony and I were not getting along. I finally got out my stack of Pet Shop Boys CDs which is over 10 not including cassettes and double CDs. Most are imports that I actually paid for and didn't download for free at one point. I have every CD they have ever released. He could care less about them. Well, I held them in my hand in front of Tony's face and said "listen, I love this group this much. I going to have a good time at this concert so don't fuck it up. Do you understand?" I continued with "you see all these CDs, I have spent hundreds of dollars on these guys because most of these CDs are imports. That is how much I love the Pet Shop Boys." My tone of voice was priceless I am sure. He got the message for a while. We got to the concert and it was a huge gay event. You could pick the straight guys out of the crowd as they held tight to their woman. Too funny. I tried taping the concert on my cell phone but it turned out terrible. In the beginning of the concert the dancers all were costumed like building blocks and had a huge square on there heads so you could not see them. They danced in sync with the music. The stage was these huge white blocks that build walls as the show went on. Two construction guys were constantly part of the show changing the wall of blocks. At the end of the concert during Tear Down the Walls the entire wall fell forward held up by ropes. It was SO COOL. We had 15th row isle seats. Perfect view. I actually stood or should I say danced in the isle the entire concert as did everyone else. That is everyone else but Tony. About the third song in out of the corner of my eye I see Tony start to sit down. SIT DOWN. Everyone is standing and dancing and he wants to sit down and not see the show or enjoy dancing with everyone. I gave him the look of death and he immediately stood back up. Unbelievable. He then got very irritated me asking him for his cell phone to take pictures since my cell phone was taping the sound from the show. We had many loving looks. LOL Nothing was going to spoil my fun and he did not. They did every song I wanted to hear but two songs. It was a sold out show. By the end of the show all the dancers were now in tights and stuff dancing while he sang. The costumes were so cool. I will get the pictures off Tony's cell phone and post them if they turn out. I did go down to the front at times to get some good pictures. Everyone was there to have a good time (except Tony) and it was just a big dance party. When we got home we had to watch the 2 hour season finally of Big Brother which had us up until 1 AM in the morning. No sense in not watching it then or it would be old news by today.

Today I worked another 9-3 shift and my back is killing me. We will most likely go out to a car show or for burgers for dinner tonight. Then it will be an early night in bed with Stella because tomorrow morning I have to drop her off at the vet for her knee surgery and not be able to pick her up until Friday. I will be a basket case. Poor Stella, she has no idea the pain she is going to be in after the surgery for a time. Plus I will be a basket case just leaving her over night which is a good idea in this case. The weekend is for Stella once I pick her up on Friday. I will most likely spend the weekend on the floor laying with her to comfort her. Poor girl. I will write to let you all know how her surgery went immediately after the doctor calls and give updates all weekend. How are we going to carry a 65 lb dog outside for a couple days to go to the bathroom? I don't have that strength anymore. Plus keeping the other 3 dogs calm and not barking to disturb Stella will be very difficult. Should be a fun weekend. NOT. Picked up my new medications which I updated on the side bar. Pravastatin 40 MG for Cholesterol which replaces Simvastatin 20 MG, and Doxazosin 2 MG for prostate replacing Flomax .4 MG.

Monday, September 14, 2009

September 14, 2009 Monday Afternoon

New blood test number are in.

Sunday Tony and I got up and after reading most of the Sunday Newspaper I made breakfast consisting of scrambled eggs, sausage and muffins. Tony then got in a cleaning mood so I stayed out of the way and let him clean. It does not happen often and I have learned when he gets in this mood to let him go. After all, he is cleaning areas like the bathroom and such that I HATE to clean. Middle of Sunday afternoon my parents drove into Milwaukee to drop off a ceiling fan they no longer use and then they were headed down to the lake front for a kite show. I got Tony in the shower and we met them down at the kite show. It was amazing. At times 8 people had kites doing tricks and acrobatics to music. Came home around dinner time and made chicken, corn on the cob and baked potatoes along with an already made salad I bought earlier in the day at the grocery store while Tony was cleaning. Spent the night watching TV and to bed by 10:30 PM. Shortly before dark one of the dogs was nice enough to bring me another baby bird they caught and killed. It breaks my heart when they do this. I try so hard to watch them when they are outside so to not let them get the birds. Life is not fair. My baby bunny is also now confirmed gone.

Today I woke up very nervous about my early afternoon doctor appointment with my infectious specialist doctor to get me latest round of blood test results. So here is the latest: I am still Undetectable (this is good and expected), my TCell count has continued to rise and has gone from 284 to 315. I am told that is a 15% ratio whatever that means. I was told that is good. I honestly was hoping for a higher number somewhere in the 400 range. Went over many of my concerns with the doctor. We are setting up a Bone Density test some time in the future to see if my bones are wearing down like I think, a side effect of the meds. I will let you know when that happens. He also wants a chest xray which he says we should have already taken and somehow it slipped through the cracks. The doctor is also concerned about my cholesterol levels which are now not good and most likely do to a counter reaction from the Atripla. He has switched me to a new cholesterol drug and a new prostate drug. Since I turned in the prescription sheet at the pharmacy on my way home I do not have their names right now. I will update the sidebar 'current medications' when I find out the specific names. I should have taken an anxiety pill prior to going to the doctor today. This was the first time Tony did not go with me. As I sat in the doctors office all I could do is cry. I couldn't stop crying. I simply seem to loose it when I have to go see this doctor and updated results. He is a good doctor, I am told one of the best, but it just takes a toll on me. Pulled myself together long enough until the doctor walked into the room and then I busted out crying again. When he asked why, I simply told him 'I hate having this disease'. He told me I am doing well and my progress is just what he would want and expect. This is some comfort, but it still doesn't take away the fact I am considered AIDS. The doctor is not sure why the sun is burning my skin and the rashes I seem to get from being out in the sun. He assumes it is from one of the drugs and simply told me to continue to put sun screen on if I am going to be outside for any length of time. I lost another 3 lbs since my last appointment. I think it is my bone mass shrinking. The doctor also told me my thrush and mouth problems are gone. Gone. So any problem Tony is having with a sore on his penis is by no means my fault. He said he is 100% sure it is not from my mouth. I told him I really wish Tony was sitting here to hear this because he keeps blaming me. When I called Tony after returning home and told him this along with all the other news he simply went speechless. I even had to ask him if he was still on the telephone line. Is it wrong for my mind to wonder if he could be fooling around on me? Is it wrong for me to ask considering what I have put him through in the last 9 months? I simply said to him 'you are not getting that from me, so I don't know where your getting it'. I seriously do not know where to go with this. I trust Tony 100% but if he did not and is not getting this fungus infection on the head of his penis from me, where is he getting it from? The doctor asked if he was circumcised, which he is. Any thoughts? Do I go down this road or let it go? The sore has cleared up, but we have not had sex in a couple weeks now without a condom. Sucking a condom is not fun even with flavor lubricant. Tony has never to this day asked me how I think I got AIDS or accused me of fooling around on him in our 20+ years together, is it fair for me to ask or accuse him? Need to spell check and sit back for a while and go through my 4 pages of blood test. Any and all comments are really appreciated.

Tomorrow night Tony and I have concert tickets to see The Pet Shop Boys. Should be a fun concert.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

September 13, 2009 Sunday Morning

Thursday night one of my new tenants gave me a new music mixing software to put on my computer. It is called Atomix Virtual DJ Professional. Most know how much I love to mix dance music. Many have checked out my Music Page. I have been using Sound Forge up until today. With Sound Forge I have to manually try to match the beats. With Atomix Virtual 'it' matches or 'syncs' the mixed beats. So Thursday night I was up late playing with it on the computer getting to know what it can or can not do. I finally had to turn off the computer and figured I will spend most of Friday making some music mixes.

Needless to say I woke up Friday morning and jumped on the computer to begin a day of mixing music. Tony was off to work and the grocery shopping can wait. So I loaded up about 40 of my favorite dance songs and started mixing. Unfortunately once you start a mix you can not stop. When you stop, there is no way to not have a break in the mix. Breaks are bad to a mixer. I did manage to shower and vacuum in between the recording of each song. I even made it to lunch with the guys. Lunch with the guys was great. Spent the afternoon continuing to mix music. Most do not realize it is not easy to do and takes a long time. You have to record in 'real time' and really concentrate as if you have an audience. Friday night we were both still full from a big lunch and I made soup and we watched TV all night.

Saturday (yesterday) was the big Center Street Block Party that is four houses from our house. We are four houses off Center Street. The bands set up on almost every block so you can just sit on the back deck and watch the people and listen to the music. We spent most of the day walking up and down the 8 block stretch back and forth meeting and talking with friends and neighbors. Huge turn out again the year. Each year it gets bigger and bigger. Got a flu shot at the festival that Walgreen's was giving out. The best part is the morning 'push pull cart race'. The local businesses make a push cart and you race down the street a block and back. It is so funny. Most years someone always gets hurt crashing into the audience or making the turn at the end of the block and racing back to the finish line. This year was no different. I brought my fold up chair because my left hip is starting to give me problems. I go to the doctor this Monday and one of the things on my list is to find out what road we need to travel down or what doctor I need to see about my bone density changing so rapidly. I feel like my hip is about to give out and my knees have not been much better. My left hip burns and I have a feeling an MRI is going to be warranted somewhere down the road. I think it is the AIDS meds breaking down my muscles and bone mass. I have read this happens. One of the bad side effects like wasting syndrome. I sure hope a new hip is not in the cards. Spent Saturday night simply watching TV and went to bed some time around 10:30 PM.

This morning I made eggs, sausage and toast for breakfast. I think the most we will do is buy our weekly lottery tickets and do some grocery shopping. Maybe go for a drive in the Cadillac since the summer days are numbered. Not sure if I have mentioned it but Milwaukee has been in an unbelievably great weather pattern. We have not had rain for over 2 weeks (we need rain) and it has been in the 70s during the day and 50s at night. The extended forecast shows the same for at least another week. I can not complain about the weather, it has been great.

Monday I have an early afternoon doctor appointment and will find out my latest numbers. Also have a number of concerns to talk to him about. My hip pain being first on my list. I am actually in pain today from all the walking yesterday. I will write and update with new numbers by Monday night.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

September 10, 2009 Thursday Night

Wednesday I worked all day at the warehouse continuing to move product from one room to another on carts to expand and get it set up properly. My tenant has continued to come to work with me and it has worked out very well. He has worked very hard. He has worked as hard as me. In seven hours of working we stopped working twice for a five minute cig. I was exhausted by the time I got home, got what I could done around the house before Tony walked in the door and we left the house to get some cheap burgers down the road at a local bar. Got home and just watched the Presidents speech, Criminal Minds and CSI, then off to bed.

Today was much the same. We both worked very hard. I am glad I do not go in again and work until next week Tuesday due to my need for Friday off to get the household stuff done and of course have lunch with the guys. Lunch with the guys is my therapy. Monday I have my doctor appointment and need that day off. Should have new numbers by Monday night. I am hopeful. Tonight we are just watching Big Brother, CSI and whatever else is on after that and then I will be ready to go to bed. Another roofer is coming by tomorrow morning to give an estimate on a new roof. Grocery shopping and lunch is all I have planned so far.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

September 8, 2009 Tuesday Night

Monday Tony and I went back to Home Depot to return the bulb we bought for the outside driveway light that didn't seem to work. We ended up buying a brand new light since the old bulb for some reason stopped working also. I like the new light better. We drove around the Milwaukee lake front in the afternoon, stopping by Tony's mothers house for about an hour to say hi. For dinner we decided to walk down the block to a Mexican restaurant which ended up being closed. Walked another block farther to find that bar/restaurant closed, and then another. Ended up walking home, getting in the car, and going out for burgers. Watched a little TV and went to bed.

Today I went to work and worked about 6 1/2 hours. Came home to another roofing company guy to give us an estimate on a new house roof that must be put on by winter. The company owner came out to give the estimate. After looking around the house with Tony and I for about an hour he told us he honestly would not want to do the job and will not. Too many peaks and valleys. Wow. I did appreciate his honesty rather than a crappy job. So the estimates continue. We have had two. One is $9000 the other is $15,000. Big difference in price. Either way high. Tonight we met some friends at the Harley Davidson Car show and hung out for a while and had a burger. Just watching Big Brother on TV. Looking forward to bed since I am tired from working hard all day in the warehouse moving and stocking product.

Wow, did a spell check and not one word spelled wrong. LOL

Sunday, September 6, 2009

September 6, 2009 Sunday Dinner Time

Was a pretty good weekend so far. How could it not be with the Harley Davidson Reunion and the Gay Softball Tournaments going on in Milwaukee this weekend. Hundreds of gay softball players from all over the country right here in Milwaukee to play baseball and party.

Friday night Tony and I went to a block party in the third ward where the gay bars are that was for the gay national softball tournament. Was about 8 blocks of gay jocks. Was a great entertainment lineup that included Amber. We had a great time at the block party Friday night. Hundreds of really good lookin guys from out of town.

Saturday Tony went into work and I went grocery shopping. The Northshore Fire Department had boots in hand taking donations at the grocery store. I never saw such a good looking/handsome fire department of guys. I walked up and looked at them all and said to one 'its hard to choose, but you are the most handsome'. He thanked me and said it was the first compliment today. I could hear the guys talking about my comment as I walked into the grocery store. On my way out I let them know that if my house is ever on fire I sure home the Northshore Fire Department puts out the fire. Saturday afternoon Tony and I went to a Harley Davidson block party downtown on Water Street and then headed over to another festival that had food tasting. Came home around dinner time and spent time with the dogs before heading to another gay party like the one the previous night for the softball league that was at all places --- the Harley Davidson Museum. How times have changed. Pretty cool for Harley Davidson to throw a gay party for us. Had a good time. Many, many pretty men and by 10 PM my eyes hurt and it was time to go home. LOL. My legs, hips and feet hurt also from all the walking.

Sunday morning (today) we got up and read the paper and after a couple donuts Tony and I drove to Walgreens for some prescriptions. Big Lot to check if they had step ladders. The gas station for our weekly lottery tickets. And last to Home Depot for a list of household items including 6 step ladders for at work. Got everything on the list. We came home and shortly left the house again in the 65 Cadillac Convertible, with the top up because I can not do sun, and drove around the lake front stopping at Taco Bell for some lunch. On the way home we stopped off at a festival in St Francis and at Pick N Save to see the Northshore Fire guys and buy some corn on the cob and dinner items so we can just stay home tonight and cook burgers on the grill. I mentioned to the Northshore Fire Department guys that they should seriously think about making a calendar. Watching a weeks worth of One Life To Live right now. Soon the dogs will be at my feet wanting dinner. Stella is still limping around. She goes in for surgery a week from this Thursday. I have a week and a half to try to keep her not running around causing more damage. The vet says it is deterioration of the knee and tearing. After we make burgers and dinner we will most likely stay home tonight and enjoy the GREAT weather we have been having here in Milwaukee for the past week or more. It has been in the 70s during the day, 50s at night. No rain for a week. Perfect weather. No rain in sight for at least a few more days. What a great stretch of weather here in Milwaukee is you love 70s.

Friday, September 4, 2009

September 4, 2009 Friday Morning

Not having a good morning today.

Yesterday my tenant and I headed to work at 8:30 in the morning and worked the longest day I have worked since going back working outside the house since January. I didn't get home until close to 5 PM. Very productive day. Got the rest of the shelving set up and started moving the warehouse product around with the owner, my tenant and another employee. Very physical work. Worked out butts off and I was in physical pain by the time I got home. Did very little last night due to being so tired. At one point Tony made a comment to me saying ' I never said you had to go back to work'. I went outside for a while and when I came in I tried to explain to him that even though I feel so exhausted and every muscle hurts I feel I had the most rewarding week I have had in a long time. I feel a sense of accomplishment and appreciated by the owner for all I have done this week. I went on to tell him working at home or around the house is not as rewarding and certainly not appreciated verbally from him as it is with coworkers outside the house. It is amazing to me that when I was in my 20s working in retail I worked 12 hour days and felt like I did last night. Now I work a 6 or 8 hour day and feel the same. Guess that what happens when you are 48 years old? Or is it the AIDS? Was in bed by 9:30 sleeping.

This morning I had to go into the hospital for my next round of blood tests. No food or coffee prior. Not good when you wake up in a fog like I do from the meds. Also not good with all the morning bowel problems I have daily. Was a real struggle trying to push myself to the hospital, walk to the blood department and drive home. Picked up some McDonald's on the way home and after Tony left for work I went back and laid on the bed. Soon I was crying. Not sure why. I think the busy exhausting week has caught up with me and my body says I did too much. It will be interesting to see if the blood work shows this in my numbers this time around. I still am in pain, muscle pain from the hard work. I feel like my good week has come crashing down on me. Why? I was feeling good. Feeling accomplishment. Is it because I today feel so limited? Am I afraid of my next round of blood results? What will I do if this past week has not helped increase my numbers and in fact made them worse? Maybe it is just the slow Whitney Houston Greatest Hits that is making me so depressed this morning? Either way I wish I could stop the tears this morning. Hopefully lunch with the guys today will help. Later this afternoon Tony and I have to take Stella back to the vet for another round of xrays so they can get some better views. The vet did call yesterday and tell us it looks like surgery will cost about $1500.00 on her leg. Tony is not happy. He is saying he will take her to a different vet. I simply told him if he wants a second opinion or thinks he can find a cheaper option HE needs to do it. I am not. I told him he has until next Wednesday or I will schedule the surgery here at our vet for the $1500.00. Since he is not home as much he does not see her limping and the pain. I DO. With all the hours I am working this month I just figure I am working for Stella's surgery this month. Will know more after the next round of xrays as to what the surgery will entail. We have no plans this weekend for Labor Day. The way I feel right now that is fine with me. I am sure something will come up as the weekend unfolds.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

September 2, 2009 Wednesday Dinner Time


I have been working the last three days setting up 8 foot shelving units at the North location.
Monday I went to the South location and took care of some business and challenges before starting the project at the North location. Came home Monday in the afternoon and cleaned the house until Tony got home for dinner. I don't even remember what I made for dinner Monday night. We were in bed by 10:30 PM.

Tuesday (yesterday) I went to the North location with our new tenant and put in about 6 hours. One of two tenants upstairs at this time does not have a job and is in the process of looking for one here in Milwaukee. Since my boss suggested I find some help doing all the physical labor of setting up and moving the new warehouse I asked the tenant if he wanted to work for a while and make some money. He helped my yesterday and today at work and is going in with me again tomorrow. Since there is so much that could and should be done around the company I figure I can keep him busy for months if he wants and hopefully get him a full time job at the company I work for. We need someone to do various things that no one ever has time for. It might come to the point where he actually kinda works for me and I pay him weekly and then get reimbursed from the owner at the end of the month. He has really helped and I would not have gotten as much done without him. We even seem to work good together. He anticipates my next moves and is right there when I need him. I even asked Tony last night why the two of us don't work that well together on projects. LOL. I am very happy the way it is turning out.
I received my letter today from social security with my next doctor appointment they want me to go to on September 29. Jeez, here we go again. If I get denied again I am just going to bite the bullet and go back to work on the payroll rather than under the table like it has been. I am not going to fight it in court if denied. At least that is my thinking today. Tonight we are going out for cheap burgers with the guys upstairs. I am so glad we got good tenants. I am so happy with them. We don't even hear them upstairs and they are very polite and obviously brought up correctly by their parents. They even signed the lease and paid this months rent. I still have not heard from the doctor regarding Stella's surgery. I called the vet again today to say WTF. The vet says they still are waiting to talk to the person who will be doing the surgery. I keep telling them Stella is in pain and can not walk. We need this done sooner rather than later.

So, bottom line is that I am doing good. Feeling exhausted and my muscles hurt from the hard work the last few days, but it is a good hurt. Life is worth living. Tomorrow I will go to work all day with the tenant and work with the owner starting to move product around the warehouse and get it set up - her way. Friday I go in again for my next round of blood tests. I can't wait to learn the numbers and will pass them on when I get them on September 11th. I am wondering if working so hard this week will affect the numbers. Another reason I am looking forward to them. If my Tcells haven't increased much I might have to cut back on all the working until my body gets healthier.