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Monday, January 31, 2011

January 31, 2011 Monday Morning

The biggest snow storm of this winter is just starting.

Spent the weekend watching a lot of movies. Most of them were pretty good, a couple were excellent. Friday night we watched the rented DVD called Ciao. It was OK. I was hopping the couple would get together in the end. It ended fast and left you wondering why? Went to bed around 10 PM Friday night.

Saturday we spend the morning watching our usual TV shows of Sell This House and Flip This House. Tony went to the shop in the morning to work on trying to get the tenant out that has not paid January rent yet. I made a music mix. Going back and remixing my mixes with my new software. The mixes turn out so much better. Will let you know when I post them or replace them on my music page. Spent the afternoon watching a bunch of Law and Order shows. You only need to watch the first five minutes and your hooked for an hour, then another, then another hour. Also spent the afternoon working on securing the fencing around the bottom of the deck. It seems my possum somehow got into the side yard and now is living under our deck. The dogs are not happy. I had to drag Stella out from under the deck Saturday morning. So I called the humane society to find out what to do to get rid of it. I was told to shine a spot light on under the deck and also put a radio outside. Sooner or later between the radio and the bright light it should leave. I kept the side gate open the last two nights hoping it would leave. I honestly don't know how it got into the yard over our 6 foot high fencing, much less how it will get out of the yard. I have not seen the possum since Saturday but I can tell from the smell of it and Stella still going nuts outside trying to get under the deck that it must be there. The neighbors must love me for a radio blasting outside under our deck. Saturday night we watched the movie called The Ritz. It is an older movie. We were told it was good so I downloaded it. It was not so good and we couldn't wait for it to end. Went to bed around 10:30 PM.

Sunday morning I made breakfast. We went grocery shopping around noon. I am rethinking my bringing Tony with me grocery shopping each week idea. Jeez, he doesn't look at the price of anything and if it looks good he would throw it in the cart. As we shopped and he was not around I had to then remove the items from the basket and hope he wouldn't notice at check out time. Spent the afternoon watching a bunch of movies. The first movie was called Rock Haven. It was very very good. Plot was about a religious mother and son moving to a new location and the religious son falling in love with a neighbor boy. A coming out story. It was very good and another example of how some of the religious families screw there kids up mentally. How can you say you love your son one minute and then tell him to move out of the house when he tells you he might be gay? So sad. Worth searching out and renting. The next movie was called The Redwoods. This movie was excellent. It actually made for an interesting conversation when the movie was over. The story involved a gay couple. One of the two leaves town for a week because they are having problems. The day the one leaves a stranger shows up looking for directions and the romance begins. Now usually you would not be in the corner of the two hooking up because he is of course cheating on his current lover. But, the story line was so good and the romance was so honest, not to mention both guys were so handsome, you wanted them to be together in the end. I don't want to give to much away but I am glad I saw the movie at home rather than at a movie theater because Tony and I were in tears by the end of the movie. I definitely recommend the movie Redwoods. It was EXCELLENT! Have the Kleenex ready. We then watched a movie called Pornography - A Thriller. It was very hard to follow and I still didn't understand it when it was over. It was a thriller about the death of a porn star. I would skip this movie if I had to do it over again. Went to bed around 10 PM Sunday night. So if you enjoy gay themed movies that have a plot, not just about sex, rent Rock Haven and Redwoods.

This morning I was up by 6:30 AM. Got the dogs fed and Tony off to work. The morning has not started well today. Not only did the dogs pee on two of the carpets during the night (at least they did it on the throw carpets), a major snow storm is just beginning here in Milwaukee. It looks like the snow will begin this morning and go through Wednesday. All said we might get close to 2 feet of snow. Tuesday night we even have a blizzard warning posted. Since I have nothing on my schedule this week I guess shoveling will be what I do the next few days. I also will spend the days remixing some of my music mixes. Talked with my dad and sister on Skype already this morning. Have to get showered and do some cleaning before the snow comes down any harder and I have to pull out the shovel.

Friday, January 28, 2011

January 28, 2011 Friday Night

Last night we watched the movie Going The Distance. It was OK. Went to bed around 10 PM.

This morning I was up by 7 AM. Fed the dogs and got Tony off to work. Made myself a bowl of cereal for breakfast. Headed out the door around 9:30 AM to go to the UPS store to mail a present for my nephew's Birthday later in the month. Then I to Blockbuster to rent the DVD Ciao. I saw a trailer for the movie and it looks good. Then went through the Walgreen's drive through and get two prescriptions. Had a great lunch with the guys today. At one point I couldn't remember a movie we watched during the week, the name just wouldn't come to me. After a bit I looked at Tony and asked him what the movie I can't remember was. To my surprise he read my mind without me even explaining the movie, all I said was 'there was one more movie we watched that I wanted to talk about' and he surprisingly came up with the movie. The look on my face must have been priceless since Tony usually has no memory. LOL. Spent the afternoon looking for a glove I can not seem to find. I did laundry yesterday and washed both gloves. When I went to put laundry away one glove was missing. I have searched everywhere. Where the hell does the laundry go? You all know what I am talking about when washing socks. Does the washing machine eat them? I still can not find the one glove and have looked everywhere. Making chili, bagel and salad for dinner tonight. Tony was told not to come home tonight unless his 2010 property taxes are paid. I have been reminding him all week and I told him at lunch not to come home tonight if he doesn't get them paid. They must be paid by the end of January or get a penalty. Why do some guys wait until the last minute? I pay bills the day they arrive. Tonight we will watch Regis and Kelly that I DVR'd today. The guest host was Mike Catherwood. What a hunk. I think the show found the replacement for Regis who is leaving this summer. He looks like her husband in real life and the chemistry between the two was great. I would love to see more of him on TV. He is a radio host in California, and single. Will then watch the movie Ciao and go to bed. No plans this weekend. Tony has to change the locks on his second auto body shop tomorrow because the renters have yet to pay January's rent. He told them this would happen and I will make sure of it. It pisses me off when people don't pay their rent. It is not like we can tell the bank no payment this money, we didn't get rent. Got a comment about my lack of energy being sun related. I have to agree. I am going to search the Internet for lights or bulbs that might help with this. Thank you for the suggestion.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

January 27, 2011 Thursday Dinner Time

Last night we spent the night watching American Idol auditions from Milwaukee. Was nice to see familiar sights as we watched the show. After AI we watched the pilot to Harry's Law which I DVR'd last week. It was ok. Went to bed around 10:00 PM after taking my second night of my new AIDS meds.

Got up this morning around 6:30 AM. I know I had a couple dreams last night but they were not vivid enough to remember like they had been on Atripla. Actually only got up once during the night, which is rare. I usually am up at least twice. Fed the dogs and got Tony off to work. He took my car today to work on the rattle in the front of the car. Hopefully he will get it done today or I am without a car again tomorrow. We do have other cars, but I have not driven them and don't like to drive cars I have not driven before. So I guess there is a car here if I had an emergency. Spent the morning watching the snow fall again. Around 11 AM it stopped and I went outside to shovel all the snow that fell. Took about an hour. Made myself a bowl of soup for lunch and spent the rest of the afternoon either cleaning or listening to music on the couch with the dogs. I am tired again today. If it was 10 PM right now I would go to bed, I am that tired. Not sure why, I sure hope it is the winter blues. Making a meatloaf, green beans, rice and a salad for dinner tonight. Tomorrow is lunch with the guys, always fun and looked forward to. Then the weekend is here again and time with Tony. I figure I have at least another month and a half of this cold winter weather to deal with. I looked back on my past posts last year and the year before at this time and it seems I go through this this time of year because of the cloudy weather and not much to do around the house. Once it gets warm outside I can have fun in the yard with the dogs and my gardens. Will watch American Idol again tonight. The rest of the shows on TV are all reruns except for Outsourced, which I will DVR. Will most likely watch a movie after American Idol because of the reruns. Tony feeds the birds with a bird feeder in the front of our house every morning when he gets the morning newspaper. We have hundreds of birds that come and eat all day. Sometimes it looks like the bushes are moving there are so many birds. Well, there is this Eagle that lives around here and I have seen it eyeing the birds for over a year. Have even seen him scoop down and get a few. Today I looked in the bushes and the Eagle was eating one of the birds Tony feeds every day outside. Nature is so sad and every day is a struggle to survive. Was sad to watch. I didn't want to scare the Eagle since the bird he was eating he already killed. So I let him eat it in front of the windows. Figured if I scared him away he would just go kill another bird. So sad.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

January 26, 2011 Wednesday Afternoon

Last night we watched movies instead of the President's speech on TV. We watched the movies Ice Blues: A Donald Strachey Mystery and Game of Death. Ice Blues had Chad Allen as a private detective that is gay. It was nice to watch a movie where the main character is gay and him having a lover is no big deal. Game of Death was OK. Went to bed around 10 PM after a little lovin.

This morning I got up by 6:30 AM. Slept pretty good last night considering it was my first night on my new AIDS meds. I did get up around 2 AM and take some antacids for my stomach but was able to fall back asleep right away after returning to bed. I for once can not even remember having any dreams last night. What a nice change. Got the dogs fed and Tony off to work. Worked out for a half hour, which was not easy, but had to be done. Showered and headed out to the grocery store to buy some items I had coupons for. Yesterday I got 2 coupons from Hills Brothers coffee FREE because I called the company last week to complain about the coffee cans shrinking in size and quantity. Made sure I got the BIG cans for free rather than the new smaller size cans. There are still a couple more larger cans on the shelf, but they will be gone soon once others see the change. Stopped off at McDonalds for 2 breakfast burritos before going to the grocery store. Was home by 10:30 AM and did a little cleaning before laying down for a nap. I still have no energy and it is still cloudy here in Milwaukee. Making the left over beef roast from Monday for dinner tonight. Tonight on American Idol the show is from Milwaukee. Check out all the talent we have here in Milwaukee on American Idol tonight. LOL. I think the dogs are going a little crazy being in the house and me sleeping so much. Bo keeps bringing me his toys one at a time. I do feel sorry for them, but it is too cold outside and such is life. Below is a pic from Sunday of Tony and a few of the dogs watching the Green Bay Packer football game.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

January 25, 2011 Tuesday Afternoon

Another day with NO energy. Not sure what the problem is but I just can not seem to get myself motivated to do anything. Spent most of the day on the couch or in bed again today. I did manage to work out for 30 minutes this morning, but after that, I was done for the day. Slept most of the afternoon again today. I got my new AIDS meds today, Truvada and Viramune, so starting tonight the fun new side effects begin. The new meds came with about 8 pages of information and side effects to look out for. Sometimes you got to wonder what these drugs are doing to our bodies if there are so many side effects. Tonight we will stay in and watch the President give his speech on TV or watch a couple movies. I honestly could go right back to bed I am so tired, and I am drinking a cup of coffee. It is cloudy again today but it just seems like more than that going on with my body. I feel depressed, tired and have no motivation to do anything.

Monday, January 24, 2011

January 24, 2011 Monday Afternoon

Sunday afternoon Tony and I went grocery shopping and then came home and spent the afternoon watching the Green Bay Packers Football game. I must admit I have never watched a football game before but since our team is so close to the Super Bowl I felt the need. I honestly don't even understand the game of football. The Green Bay Packers won and will be headed to the Super Bowl. Spent the rest of the day watching movies. We watched the movies 127 Hours, Devil, and Case 39. All three movies were very good. Went to bed around 10 PM.

This morning I was up by 6:30 AM. Got the dogs fed and Tony off to work. Have no energy today and spent the morning back in bed. Finally got up again around noon and started making a beef roast for dinner. It has been cooking now all afternoon with potatoes and carrots. The house smells so good right now from it cooking all afternoon. Went across the alley for a bit and talked with the neighbor. I could go right back to bed I am so tired. Not sure why, might be because it is cloudy outside and that has a big effect on my energy level. Will most likely spend the night watching the CBS line up on TV tonight before going to bed. It is close to 32 degrees today so it seems a lot warmer outside than it was last Friday when we had a high of 6 degrees. I have nothing on my schedule this week and am very happy about that, especially the way I feel today. My new AIDS drugs should arrive tomorrow and I plan on starting them that day. I do have a call into a pharmacist to talk with him about what side effects I will have going from Atripla to the new meds. Hopefully the dreams will stop because I woke up to another weird dream this morning. Some of my dreams being on Atripla are so vivid and weird they would make a good movie. Looks like it is starting to snow outside again. I am so tired of winter.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

January 22, 2010 Saturday Night

Forgot my Atripla last night for the first time in two years!

Had a great lunch with the guys Friday afternoon. Spent the afternoon listening to Ke$ha. Tony got home from work around 5:30 PM. I made soup for dinner. Spent the night watching the movie Lakeview Terrace. It was a very good movie. Went to bed around 10 PM like usual. Except it was not like usual.

This morning I got up around 7 AM and when I walked into the kitchen to take my morning pills I noticed my pills I usually take at bedtime, my Atripla, was still in the pill container. Fuck! I was so proud of myself that I could say I never missed a dose of my AIDS meds for two years. Never missed a dose prior to going to bed until last night. Took the pill right away. I do realize that after two years of taking this med that one night missed will not kill me. I also realize this can not happen again. Not sure what was different about last night. Made us some breakfast bowls for breakfast and spent the morning watching Sell This House and Flip This House. Around 1 PM I laid down to take a nap. Woke up around 3 PM and Tony was watching Ferris Bueller's Day Off on TV. We have seen this movie more times than any other movie except The Sound Of Music or Wizard Of Oz, but it is still funny every time you watch it. It is a classic. Just got done taking a shower and giving Barkley another bath. He has scabs all over his body and I might have to put him back on an antibiotic if these baths don't start helping. He gets them because of allergy problems. Watching an episode of Hoarders on TV right now, wow, these people are nut jobs. Sorry if that includes any of my followers, but come on, who can't throw away food from a week a go or dishes used a week ago. Tony will take a shower soon and give Stella a shower also since she needs one. She is starting to smell like a dog. LOL. It got into the teens today temperature wise. Like a heat wave compared to yesterday's high of 6 degrees. Will most likely go out for dinner tonight since Tony stated he wants some 'good' food. Will then spend the night watching more movies or stuff we have DVR'd. Still kicking myself for the missing of my pill last night. I have to move on and take it as a lesson I guess.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

January 20, 2011 Thursday Night

Watched American Idol and then Law And Order SVU last night on TV. I did enjoy American Idol and the new judges. Law And Order is always worth watching. Went to bed around 10 PM.

This morning I got up around 6 AM. Fed the dogs and got Tony off to work. Spent the morning doing a little cleaning and vacuuming around the house. About 11:30 I drove to ARCW for my board meeting. Had a good lunch and meeting. Picked up my monthly food at the food pantry and headed home. Made a salad for dinner to go along with the 2 boxed lunches I brought home from the meeting that no one ate. Got a letter today from my mortgage company canceling my line of credit due to falling home prices. WTF? I paid them money to get that line of credit, paid good money, and my house value has not decreased according to my last two assessments from the city. Plus I owe very little on my home and even if I used up the line of credit it would only be half the value of my home. What a bunch of bullshit. I called the company and they told me to write a letter to appeal the decision. Wrote the letter and made copies of the last two years house assessments to show them the value of my home has not gone down. Also stated in the letter that if they do not reinstate my line of credit I want the money back that I spent to get it two years ago. Unbelievable! Will watch American Idol again tonight, then Greys Anatomy and The Mentalist before going to bed. The weather man says now we will be lucky to have a high of 6 degrees tomorrow. Wind chills are going to be about 30 below zero. I feel so sorry for the dogs having to go out and do their thing in this cold weather. I have to yell at them to get them in and out quickly before they freeze and start to fall from not being able to walk.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

January 19, 2011 Wednesday Afternoon New Blood Test Results

New Blood Test Results Today.

Today I had my appointment with my AIDS doctor to get my latest blood test results from the blood test I had a little over a week ago. The doctor's visit was OK, but the results could have been better. My CD4 count dropped from 412 to 335. Although my doctor is not alarmed by this drop it does not make me happy. These numbers are even lower then the blood test results from last August. The good news is my percentage went up from 21% to 22%, which the doctor says is more important. This means that a bigger percentage of my 'good blood' is better than it was and continues to rise. Some more bad news is that my Glucose levels are very high, higher than they were the last tests. This could be because I have gained 15 pounds since the last doctor's visit. I was told I need to loose the weight and start working out daily to do this. If this level continues to increase I could become diabetic. Also my Hepatitis A levels did not register and should have since I had the vaccine shots the last visit. So, I had to get another Hepatitis A vaccine shot today in my right arm. I still am undetectable though, so that is good. If that wasn't enough, my vitamin D levels are too low also so I now have to start taking 2 vitamin D's a day instead of the one I have been taking. Also, I talked to my doctor about the vivid dreams / nightmares that continue since starting Atripla two years ago. We decided to switch my meds with the next refill in 30 days since I just got a refill today of Atripla in the mail. I am switching from the one pill a day Atripla to 3 pills a day of Truvada and Viramune. Not sure which one I have to take two pills for, but one of them is one pill a day, the other is two pills a day. This switch should make the nightmares stop. I am not to excited about switching meds since the Atripla is working, but I was assured that I should be fine and can always go back to Atripla if these new drugs don't work as well. I was happy to take one pill a day, now I will have to take 3 pills a day for the same results. Hopefully I will not have to go through all the side effects with this switch. I will let you know in a month when I start the new meds.

Stopped off at Walmart prior to the doctor's appointment and bought a cool water mister to add some moisture to the air in the living room. I already have one in the bedroom. Bought a couple other items that we needed also. Tonight the new season of American Idol begins. We will be glued to the TV since we love this show. Should be interesting to see how it is this season with the new judges. Suppose to get very cold here in Milwaukee the next few days. The coldest air we have had in two years is set to hit us on Friday. The weather man says a high of 7 degrees on Friday. WTF? Seven degrees for a high? Will most likely just go out for lunch on Friday and nothing else since that is way to cold for me.

Monday, January 17, 2011

January 17, 2011 Monday Afternoon

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!

Around lunch time yesterday Tony and I did go to Pick N Save and make the bank deposit, got lottery tickets, and bought some milk and ham and rolls. Made hot ham and rolls for lunch. Shortly after lunch we all went to the bedroom and took a long 3 hour nap. Woke up around 4 PM and got up, Tony and the dogs followed shortly. Made hamburgers, baked beans and a salad for dinner. Watched a little of the award show before switching the channel to watch Desperate Housewives and Brothers and Sisters before going to bed. Went to bed around 10 PM.

This morning I was up by 6 AM and got up. Was not tired anymore because of all the sleep and napping the day prior. Got the dogs fed and Tony off to work. The snow began around 8 AM so I got in the car and went to Walgreen's to buy some sale items knowing the snow would keep me from going out again all day. Got home around 9 AM and made some breakfast. Spent the morning watching the snow fall and TV. Made a ham sandwich for lunch and took a couple hour nap. It is still snowing out. Suppose to get about 5 inches before it is all over. Looks like we have close to that already and it doesn't look like the snow is ending any time soon. Making a Cherie pie for desert tonight. Got the pie for free, it is Cherie, which I do not like, so the pie is for Tony. Making a beef roast, mashed potato and corn with a salad for dinner. Will hopefully get out and shovel sometime before dinner and then have to do it again tomorrow morning.

Wednesday I go to my HIV doctor to get my latest round of blood test results. I am also going to talk to him about he vivid scary dreams I continue to have being on Atripla. Saturday morning I woke up screaming, Tony shaking me. The dream I was having was that Tony and I were in a bar and it got robbed. I was shot in the head. Yes, shot in the head. That is when Tony woke me up. What a nice dream hey? Sunday morning I woke up in a dream that I was on a game show and I gave the right answer and the host kept saying my answer was wrong. I woke up arguing with the host about my 'correct' answer. This mornings dream was about being at college again. I had a dorm room on the 20th floor of the building. I guess I was moving in with my Pomeranian named Tiny, who has been dead for over 10 years now. My point is.............every night or morning I wake up to very vivid dreams and most are not happy dreams and start my day off very frustrated or crying. Not sure if I want to switch meds yet, but it is something we need to talk about. Tony wakes me at least once a week as I am screaming or yelling in my sleep.

Had an interesting line of thinking the other day. Was watching a show on TV about medical advancements. After watching the show it dawned on me that Tony, with his heart condition, and me with my AIDS, had had these problems 20 years ago, we would both be dead now. Twenty years ago they did not have the AIDS drugs they have now and I was so far gone two years ago, I would have been dead now without the advancements. Tony with his heart condition would not be here either without all the advancements. Got me thinking how sad that Tony and my life would not be here. That would mean someone else would be living in my house, someone else would have my dogs, we would both not be here. It was scary to say the least. Guess we both should be thankful for all the medical advancements, we are living because of them.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

January 16, 2011 Sunday Morning

Saturday morning we spent the morning watching are usual shows on A&E called Sell This House and Flip The House. Tony fixed the garage door with the new bracket he got from an old door panel he had at the shop. Around noon we went to Sams Club on the south side because it was 'guest' day and you didn't have to be a member to go and purchase. You do need to watch your prices on stuff at Sams Club. Not everything is a good price or deal. We did end up spending $300 on stuff. One hundred of it was a new 3 In One printer fax copier machine and back up ink, so that left another $200 of stuff for the house and such. It is amazing how it all adds up. We do now have enough Sweet N Low for the next 6 months, LOL. Came home and spent the afternoon watching old Law And Order shows we had not seen in the past on one of the cable channels. Made a pizza we bought at Sams Club for dinner, with a salad. Spent the night watching a couple movies. Watched the movies Boy Culture and Hereafter. Boy Culture was a gay theme movie and very good. When it ended I looked at Tony and asked him why there are not more movies like this for gay people to enjoy. Hereafter was OK but I did not like the subtitles throughout about a fourth of the movie. I can not read and follow what is happening on the screen at the same time. Went to bed around 10:30 PM last night.

This morning we were both up and out of bed by 7 AM. I honestly wish we could sleep in a bit later on the weekends, but the dogs have the final say it seems. By the third or fourth toy Bo brings me I know it is time to get up and feed them. Tony is now asking where his breakfast is so I guess I better get going on that.

Made breakfast consisting of eggs, bacon and an English muffin. It was 10 degrees outside when we got out of bed this morning. The weather says a high of 18 degrees today. I figure about noon we will go to Pick N Save and get a bank deposit made, lottery tickets purchased, and some milk and ham and rolls all at one store, a couple blocks down the street. Suppose to get more snow in the next couple days and then turn very very cold, the coldest it has been in two years the weather people are saying. Sounds like it will be another week of just leaving the house on a 'need to' basis. This afternoon we will most likely take a nap and then spend the night watching TV. A lot on TV tonight. Will most likely just read about the award show tomorrow, DVR Undercover Boss and CSI Miami, and watch the ABC line up of Desperate Housewives and Brothers and Sisters before going to bed.

Friday, January 14, 2011

January 14, 2011 Friday Mid Day

Yesterday morning I spent the morning cleaning the house because I knew I was picking up my two nephews from Tony's side of the family from his mothers house around 1 PM in the afternoon. I was going to drop off the 11 year old boy at his real father's house here on the East side and keep the 7 year old brother until Monday when the other boy's father would drive to the Illinois border and deliver them to Tony's sister. Got to the garage only to find the garage door would go half way up and was broken. Called Tony at work and asked him to come home and either fix the garage door so I could get my car out of the garage or drive me to his mother's house on the south side to get his / our nephews. He was home in a flash and we got my car out of the garage. The fix would have to wait since he was busy at work and a new bracket was needed since one broke most likely because of the cold. Picked up the two kids and on the way home dropped off the one at his fathers house. Headed home with the other. Both are good kids and we helped raise the 11 year old when his mother lived here on the East side before getting married and moving out of state. We spent the afternoon watching cartoons and playing with toys waiting for Tony to come home. It is a tense situation because I am always worried about anything happening with Stella the pit bull or one of the smaller dogs getting stepped or sat on. Guess it is the fatherly instincts in me. Tony came home around 5:30 PM with his sister's other child, a girl, three years old. Guess Tony's sister decided to stay the night at her friends house and asked Tony to go get the last of three kids from grandma's house so the two kids could spend the night here. That is a bit much for me. I do not mind having the kids when they are over 6 years old but having one for the night that is 3 is beyond my scope. Heck, she can hardly talk so you can understand her. I just found myself saying 'yes' to everything she said, LOL. We spend the night watching the movie Despicable Me. The kids had already seen the movie many times and knew almost all the words by memory before they were said. I honestly just didn't get it. I have seen many of these kind of movies and enjoyed them, the movie UP was great. But this one I just couldn't understand at times and had to look at the kids when they laughed and wonder what I missed. They both went to bed around 9 PM. We went to bed shortly thereafter. Had about 3 very vivid dreams during the night. Every time I got out of bed for something I was in the middle of a dream. They are never happy dreams. Why is that?

This morning Tony and I were up by 6:30 AM. I got up when Tony did so that I could keep an eye on the kids and the dogs. I know this is not Tony's strength. He always just figures everything will be OK. The kids got up around 7 AM since the dogs kept wanting to give them kisses. Must be that kid smell. I am not fond of that 'kid smell'. Made them both a bowl of cereal and about 9 AM their mother called and said she was on her way to pick up the girl since the boy was going to stay until Monday. Shortly before their mother got here the boy looked at me and asked if it was OK if he went home with his sister. I had to hold back the smile that came over me. Don't get me wrong, I love them both, and all, but one night was enough. LOL. It would have been a long weekend and having the two of them last night gave me my 'good uncle fill' for a while. They both left around 10:30 AM. Now I have to get this kid smell out of the house. LOL. Tony will be here soon to pick me up to go to lunch since the garage door is still not fixed and my car is trapped in the garage again. I am sure he will fix it this weekend. Will most likely take a nap this afternoon since it is cloudy outside and I did not sleep well last night. Tonight we will stay in and watch TV and enjoy the quite and our dogs. Not unhappy with the fact we don't have the kid for the weekend. Like I said, he is a good kid, I love him and all, but one night was enough. LOL

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

January 12, 2011 Wednesday Night

This morning I was up by 7 AM. My dad called me shortly thereafter on Skype. I could only talk to him for a while since I had to feed the dogs and get Tony off to work. After I got that all done I went outside and shoveled again from the snow that fell after yesterday's shoveling. Spent the rest of the morning doing a little cleaning before going to the grocery store around noon. Spent a whole lot more money than I ever imagined. One item I didn't buy was Hill's Brothers Coffee because even though I had a coupon and there was one last can left in the 33 oz size. All the rest of the Hills Brothers Coffee is now 27 oz BUT THE SAME PRICE AS THE 33 oz size. The new size of the can is very noticeable like when Eddies Ice Cream downsized their ice cream. I hate when companies do this to us consumers. Last years when Eddies Ice Cream did the same with their ice cream containers I called the company and told them I would never buy their ice cream again and have not. I got on the phone and called the Hills Brothers company and voiced my complaint. The lady taking my complaint ask me if the company could send me a coupon for a future can of coffee. I told her unless the coupon is for a free can I stand by what I said that 'I will never buy their coffee again because they are ripping off the customer and that is shameful'. I would rather pay more for a product than have the company try to screw me out of less for the same price. I will buy Folgers coffee from this point forward. I am really getting tired of companies screwing us like this. Groceries are getting expensive enough without feeling royally screwed after purchasing them. I have seen this done with OJ also. SHAMEFUL! Spent the afternoon listening to music and watching a little TV. Making spaghetti for dinner tonight with a salad. Last nights turkey burgers did not go over so good with Tony. After the first bite he asked me 'what the hell is this' and then only ate half of it. Guess I won't make turkey burgers ever again. Will spend the night watching the ABC TV line up. I actually like the show The Middle better than Modern Family. Seems Modern Family gets all the good reviews and The Middle is totally under rated.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

January 11, 2011 Tuesday Dinner Time

Was going to spend last night watching shows we DVR'd the week prior until I looked at Tony about 7:30 PM on the couch already falling asleep. No sense watching the shows while he is sleeping and then he is lost when we watch the next episode. So I spent the night watching the reruns on CBS and then Castle on ABC at 9 PM. Went to bed and watched Castle in bed. Had a lot of dreams again last night. Lately I have again been having them every night. Sometimes more than one in a night. Since they are never happy dreams I wake up quite frustrated in the morning like I just lived the dream. Last night's dream, or should I say the dream I was having before I got up, was about my past job at the beauty school / spa. I worked in the offices doing various jobs. The dream had to do with me packing up my stuff and someone in my office taking it over. It is kind of how it all did go down in the end but was a bit different. Got me thinking again how disappointed I am in all the people I worked with there since not one has contacted me in almost a year. I even sent Christmas cards this year to quite a few of the people I worked with. NOT ONE SENT ME ONE IN RETURN THIS YEAR! Not even a phone call from any one of them saying Happy Holidays or anything. I deleted every one of them from my Christmas list for next year. They are all history. Very disappointing but I guess such is life.

This morning I was up by 7 AM and fed the dogs and got Tony off to work. Spent the morning listening to Ke$ha and Britney Spears. Had a bowl of cereal with some fresh black berries for breakfast and a roll for lunch. About 2 PM this afternoon I went out to shovel the snow that has been coming down since this morning. It snowed most of yesterday and now again today. Even with the two days of snow there is less than 6 inches of it outside. So it is more of a nuisance than anything else. Since I have no reason to leave the house or go outside until tomorrow to go grocery shopping I guess it gave me an excuse to get outside and get more exercises. Shoveled at 2 PM and again around 4 PM to get the little that fell after 2 PM. Making turkey burgers, Mac N Cheese and a salad for dinner tonight. I will not tell Tony they are turkey burgers unless he asks. He would want beef hamburgers. I hope he won't notice the difference. I have never made turkey burgers so it should be interesting. So much is piling up on the DVR I think I will DVR the shows tonight while we watch shows we have on the DVR so I can fast forward through the commercials and get a few more shows watched than if we watched them live. Been over a week without a cigarette. It is getting easier and I am not even wearing the patch or anything. It is all will power. I have moments when I have to take deep breaths, but for the most part it has not been as bad as trying in the past. Still snowing out, I will have to shovel again tomorrow morning if it doesn't stop soon. Bo was so cute today in the snow. He loves playing in the snow. Today he played with a tennis ball burying it and then it would be covered with snow and too cold to put in his mouth. He would fling it in the air and then bury it again. It was really cute, even got some of it on video.

Monday, January 10, 2011

January 10, 2010 Monday Dinner Time

Yesterday about noon Tony and I went out into the Milwaukee cold and bought lottery tickets at the gas station, then went to a local grocery store to buy some fruit and prepared food for dinner, and then stopped at Walgreen's and picked up a prescription for him and one for me. Got home around 2 PM and started watching some TV. Around 3:30 PM a couple we have lunch with on Friday's called and said they had two extra tickets to a fund raiser for ARCW called Holly Jolly Folly. It was a food tasting of local restaurants in Milwaukee and free drinks before a play at the Rep Theater called 39 Steps. Since we could not afford to go to such a fundraiser if we had to pay, and the fact the tickets were paid for, we said yes. Had a hard time finding a suit coat and pants that fit me I have gained so much weight. Was not easy to find anything that fit. NOT GOOD AT ALL. Jeez, I've been working out every day for the past week and watched what I eat and have gained 4 pounds in the past week. WTF? Found a suit that fit if I didn't breath. LOL Met the friends at 5:30 PM at the event. Had one drink and tasted a bunch of food at all the displays set up around the theater corridor. Was a very classy event. There were about 20 other friends we knew there so it was a fun event. The play was not so bad either. We got home around 10 PM from the fundraiser. Watched Desperate Housewives that I had DVR'd and went to bed. Not sure what was in the air, maybe it was the fact we held hands and such at the event and during the play, and romance was in the air, because we ended up doing a little lovin before going to bed. All the dogs were on one side of the bed rather than down the middle between us so we ended up spending the night sleeping in each others arms all night. This is what led again to some more lovin in the morning. Wow, twice in one night, can't say I remember when the last time that happened. It was nice.

Got up around 7 AM and fed the dogs and got Tony off to work. About 8:30 AM I worked out for a half hour before making myself a bowl of cereal for breakfast. Spent the morning watching TV and reading the newspaper. Made myself a bowl of tomato soup for lunch. It has been snowing all day and looks like it should end soon. Have been holding off going out to shovel hoping I can do it once. We are getting a lake effect snow which means it could go on for some time. The radar looks like it should end soon, but has looked that way for a couple hours now. Making the food I was going to make last night before getting the invitation to the fundraiser. Have it all ready and just need to heat it up - Prime rib, chicken Parmesan and scalloped potato's with a salad. Will most likely spend the night watching the CBS lineup on TV tonight. OK, I've waited long enough for it to stop snowing, soon it will be getting dark outside so I guess I better get some snow moved. I am not in from shoveling and it is still snowing lightly. Been one week without a cigarette. Made it a full week without one. I am very proud of myself.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

January 9, 2011 Sunday Morning

Friday morning I had to go in for my 6 month blood test. I think I counted 9 vials of blood they took out of me this time. I must admit there was a time I hated getting my blood drawn. Now I just show them my arms and tell them to do what they need to do. I get the results back in a week and a half. Stopped off at Mc Donald's for some breakfast on the way home from the blood withdrawal. Spent the morning doing a little cleaning around the house. After having lunch with the guys I took a nap with the dogs. When I got up I did a little cleaning around the house before Tony got home from work. I laid low all day doing a little reflecting on life and what life was like two years prior to my diagnosis of HIV. Spent the night watching shows I DVR'd during the week and the last two new episodes of The Walking Dead that we had not watched yet. Went to bed around 10 PM.

Saturday I did not leave the house. It was cold here in Milwaukee and since I had no reason to leave the house we spent the entire day indoors. Spent the morning watching Sell This House and Flip This House on A&E, spent the afternoon taking a long nap from about 1 PM to 4 PM. After our nap we both showered. Tony wanted to go out for dinner, I just couldn't bring myself to go out in the cold when there is a full frig full of food to make. Ended up making a salad and a frozen pizza for dinner last night. We then spent the night watching two movies. We watched the movies Charlie St Cloud and Basement. Charlie St Cloud was an enjoyable movie. I cried in parts. Movies about death and people coming back from the dead with messages always get me choked up and cry. I would recommend renting the movie if you have not seen it. Basement was not so good and was one of those movies you just wish would end. We stayed up until a little after 11 PM because of the long afternoon nap.

Today Tony was up by 6 AM, I stayed in bed until a little after 7 AM. Fed the dogs and read about half the Sunday morning newspaper. After writing this post I will most likely make us breakfast. No plans again today. We will have to leave the house and get lottery tickets at some point today. Other than that it will be another day of watching TV and staying warm in the house.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

January 6, 2011 Thursday Late Afternoon

Got up this morning at my usual 6:30 AM time. Fed the dogs and got Tony off to work. Spent a half hour working out, re potted a plant into a different pot, took a shower, and headed to the grocery store. Made a bank deposit and did a little food shopping before coming home and making myself a ham sandwich for lunch. This is my third day without a cigarette. I am not a happy guy right now. If the dogs ask me for one more thing or need to go outside one more time, I might loose it. Been laying on the couch listening to Mariah Carey thinking of what my life was like two years ago on this date.

Two years ago to this date I was still not HIV+, at least I didn't know it. I remember these days well when this time of year comes around. I guess you never forget the day you find out you are HIV+. I remember not wanting to call my doctor for the blood results telling myself I will call tomorrow. I did know 'something' was not right with my body. I even thought it might be HIV. I never thought I would find out I have AIDS. Two years ago to this date I hoped my doctor would call and tell me everything will be ok if I take a pill or two for a short period of time. Never did I think I would have to take HIV meds for the rest of my life to stay alive. I remember playing games with my mind telling myself if it was 'that' bad my doctor would have called with my blood results by this time. Man, was I wrong. Two years ago to this date tomorrow I called my doctor to get my blood results only to be told I had to come to the office to get them. I remember thinking 'this can not be good'. I remember taking a shower to get ready to go to the office, shivering in the shower, half because of the winter's cold, half because I was so scared about what I might hear in about a half hour when I got to the doctor's office. I remember that long drive to the doctor's office even though it is only a mile away. I remember waiting in the office waiting room for what seemed a lifetime. I remember the nurse taking me to the office and putting my file down in front of me. I remember her first words to me were 'your blood test results show you are HIV+'. I think at that point the mind just sort of stops for a second and you don't hear much for a while after that news. I remember next being in my car thinking how I will ever be able to tell Tony and wondering how long I have to live. I walked into the house and called Tony at work asking him to meet me at home because my test results came back HIV+. I did not know what to expect from him at that point. He was home from work very fast. I do remember he did and said all the right things. He told me 'we will get through this' and gave me the biggest hug I can remember in our 20 years together. It is a day you never forget. The next days were filled with more doctor appointments, meeting my HIV specialist, meeting others like myself in group therapy, and crying a lot. Crying a lot! About a week later I found out not only was I HIV+, but I had AIDS. I remember not even realizing this and not even hearing my HIV doctor saying it to me until I got home with Tony from that appointment. I remember it was like a light bulb went on and I looked at Tony and said 'do you know I have AIDS?' 'I'm not just HIV+, I have AIDS'. Tony looked at me and said he realized that in the doctor's office when we went through the blood test results. It took me an hour later to have it actually set in. I remember picking up my first prescription of Atripla wondering what side effects I will have and if it will even work to keep me alive. As I look back on the last two years it sure has been a journey. Many ups and downs along the way. I am still alive. I feel better than I did two years ago. I feel healthier than I did two years ago. I have many new friends that I did not even know two years ago. And I still have Tony by my side every day to help me along this path. I would have to say I am in a better place today than I was two years ago. I still look at myself every day in the mirror and say 'you have AIDS' or hear that little voice in my head reminding me I have AIDS. But, I don't cry as often. I don't think tomorrow might be my last day on this earth anymore. I guess I have hope that next year I might even be healthier, happier, and yes ... still alive.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

January 5, 2010 Wednesday Dinner Time

Second day without a cigarette.

This morning I was up by 7 AM, fed the dogs and got Tony off to work. Shortly thereafter I started my half hour work out. Took a shower and was out the door by 9 AM to drive to the other side of town to have the dentist who pulled my tooth months ago look at the piece of tooth coming out of my gums in my mouth. The dentist looked at it and said he did not want to remove it yet and I should come back in 3 weeks. What a bunch of bullshit. This piece of tooth is cutting up my tongue. The dentist said it should work it's way out on it's own hopefully before the three weeks and having to go back to him. I honestly just wanted it removed since it is a dull pain and driving me crazy. Drove all the way back home. Started cleaning the basement and made a good dent on it. I still have a little work to do and have to sweep the floor. I have to keep busy because doing nothing makes me crave a cigarette. Came back upstairs around 2 PM and watched a little TV. About 3:30 PM my nephew called on Skype to tell me about his day at school. Started making dinner. Making pork chops, baked potato and corn with a salad. It is best I do not leave the house the next couple of days or I might kill someone from not having a cigarette. I know the third and forth day will be the worst so I am not out of the woods yet. Failure is not an option this time. I will once again tell Tony when he comes home to try to be nice to me and not push my buttons. Otherwise you might read of him in the newspaper: Lover kills lover in cigarette withdrawal. LOL. Seriously if you have ever tried quiting smoking you know how hard this is. I wish they would just stop selling the things on every corner bar or gas station if they are so bad for us. Spent last night watching the new show Live To Dance with Paula Abdul. Was not as good as I would have expected and not sure if we will continue watching after tonight's hour episode if it doesn't get better or more entertaining.
I am sitting here taking deep deep breaths trying to get through the moment without a cig. I would usually be smoking as I type this so it is hard not to have one. Wish me (and Tony) luck the next few days. Life will not be good here in my house. LOL.

Monday, January 3, 2011

January 3, 2011 Monday Dinner Time

This morning I was up by 7 AM. Got the dogs fed and Tony off to work. About 8 AM I started working out and exercising for 30 minutes. I plan on doing this every day for 30 minutes so I can get myself in better shape and loose some of this weight I have put on. When I was done I showered and was out the door by 10 AM. Drove to the printer to have some paperwork faxed, then went to the bank and grocery shopping. After I was done doing all that I stopped off at the friend who's dog died on Saturday and dropped him off some pictures and a DVD I made of all the videos I have of Saber when he was here and we were babysitting him throughout the years. Still makes me sad to think I will never see Saber again. Saber got to meet every one of my dogs. I kind of thought of him as a link to them. Now the link is broken. Hopefully they are all playing in heaven. Got home a little after noon and made myself a ham sandwich for lunch. Spent the afternoon transferring my entire 2010 blog to PDF format so I can print out a book of the year's blogging. I did this for the entire 2009 year and plan on doing it yearly. Last year I did it through This year I think I am having the printer down the street put the entire year in a binder / book format at half the cost, but won't be in hard cover form. Took an hour break and listened to some music before starting dinner around 3:30 PM this afternoon. Making a turkey loaf, green beans, rice and salad for dinner. Tonight I am not sure what we will watch. We have never watched the show the Bachelor before but the previews look like it might be worth watching. Not sure if I want to get into the series and have to watch it every week. The guy is really handsome though so it might be worth watching. If we do watch it I will DVD the entire CBS comedy lineup tonight. After the Bachelor we will most likely watch Castle on ABC. Didn't take a nap today so I am looking forward to going to bed early. Only have 5 cigs left and then the madness begins. I am already yelling at the dogs and I haven't even started quiting yet. Should be a horrible week starting tomorrow, but it must be done, no more excuses. I have a therapy appointment tomorrow morning and will most likely start picking things off my 'to do list' and get some big projects done to keep my mind off the cigs. Was again cold in Milwaukee today. I can't wait until Spring gets here.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

January 2, 2011 Sunday Night

Last night we watched the movie Public Enemies. Not my type of movie and it dragged on forever. Tony even fell asleep during the movie a couple times. Went to bed around 10 PM.

Today we were both up by 7 AM. After feeding the dogs and reading a little of the Sunday Milwaukee Journal we both showered and drove to the south side of Milwaukee to take Tony's mom out for breakfast. Had a good breakfast of scrambled eggs, two pancakes, ham and toast. Dropped off his mother and bought lottery tickets. Got home and spent the day watching TV and taking a couple hour nap with the dogs. It is very cold in Milwaukee. It was in the teens today with wind chills below zero. Talked to my nephews a couple times on Skype today. Got a call this afternoon from the friend with the old dog I took to the vet with him earlier in the week. Not good news. He ended up having a vet come to the house last night to put Saber down. So sad. I cried on the phone with him. I did this afternoon put all the video I have of his dog and all the pictures on a DVD for him. I knew this would happen soon and have been collecting all the pictures and videos for this day. The software I have allows you to put video and pictures making it a movie on DVD. It turned out good. I have video going all the way back to 1996 of Saber, when he and the dog lived here in our upstairs apartment. Ready to settle in the for night watching TV. Thankfully new shows begin tonight. Will watch Desperate Housewives and Brother's and Sister's before going to bed. Will DVR Undercover Boss and CSI Miami for later viewing. Was able to update the music page into two pages rather quickly. It was easier then I thought it would be. With two pages they load so much faster and all the mixes load without problems. Tomorrow I have to go to the bank which is at the grocery story I shop at, three blocks down the street. Will make a bank deposit and do a little grocery shopping before coming home. Also tomorrow starts the workouts in the morning. I have gained so much weight lately I have very few pants that fit. So tomorrow starts a daily work out and better eating habits. That and no more cigs. Yup, it is happening tomorrow when the half pack I have is gone. No more excuses. Wish me luck.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

January 1, 2011 Saturday Night


Had a pretty good New Year's. We met some friends at The ArtBar here on the Eastside a little after 11 PM. Watched the CNN count down up until we left for the bar with Kathy Griffith and Anderson Cooper. He should just come out. I do like the pairing of the two. She pushes him to his limits at times an the face expressions are priceless. Since my ex owns the bar he snuck us in the side door so we didn't have to pay the cover charge for the night. Counted down to the new year, gave Tony a kiss and friends hugs. About 1 AM most of our friends had left to go home already. (wow are my circle of friends getting old). We left and went home. Spend a little time watching something on TV before going to bed. I only had one double vodka and sprite along with one glass of champagne. Even with that little I felt pretty buzzed. After going to bed for a while I must admit I woke Tony up to have a little lovin. Why not enjoy the buzz right? Didn't sleep so well from having to get up every hour to go to the bathroom from the drinks. Got up around 7 AM and fed the dogs, made coffee and turned on the TV. Tony got up soon after and got the morning paper and poured our coffee. Spent the morning until about 11 AM just laying on the couch. At about 11 AM I went back to bed, Tony followed. I did talk to my nephews a couple times last night as they had a party and again today. The kids love showing their friends how they could call their Uncle Dave on the computer. Got up from our nap today around 2:30 PM and started working on the blog page adding the above new music mix. After posting I noticed when I go to the music page all the mixes past number 20 don't come up. Reloaded a couple of them and it does not seem to be fixing the problem. Might have to spend a full day splitting the page into two pages rather than one so all the mixes load, much less load faster. Either way it is not a fun fix and will take a lot of time. I do enjoy it, but it must be done when I can concentrate and Tony is not home. Anyone who ever has made a web page knows the time and concentration it takes. Took a shower a little while ago and now just thinking what we might be having for dinner. Guess it depends on what I cook or have delivered. Delivery sounds good at this point. Will most likely spend the night watching movies.
Hope everyone had a great New Years. I hope all the best for all of you.