July 22, 2015 Wednesday Afternoon

Saw my HIV doctor today and got my latest blood results.  My TCell count has gone down a bit but that could be very well due to the Prostate infection I have and had at the time.  My percent of good cells is about the same.  I am undetectable which is the goal.  Doctor is very happy with my blood work but was not happy with my Prostate problem and how it has progressed.  I explained how my day starts to my HIV doctor like this:

I wake up around 5:30 AM when the other half rolls out of bed.  I then lay in bed for about and hour sweating like crazy with cold chills until I can no longer be in bed.  At 6:30 I then get up dripping wet to feed the dogs.  As I am feeding the dogs I am usually throwing up or gagging into the sink to get the bile out that makes me feel like throwing up for the first two hours of my morning.  I get the dogs fed just in time to run to the toilet for an explosive bowel movement.  I can not even have a sip of coffee for the first hour due to the feeling of throwing up.  I also explained that if I have one good day like I had yesterday, I then pay the price like I am today, tired, feeling like crap, and just want to be in bed.  He was not concerned since he has seen worse and said we had talked about this before.  All part of being HIV and AIDS.  He did think we need to address the Prostate issue and asked me to call my Prostate doctor to get a CT scan and then an appointment with the actual doctor, not just his nurse.  My Prostate doctor reminds my of the Wizard Of OZ.  I have never seen him, only his nurse.  Not sure what you have to do to actually see the doctor.  I did just leave a message with the nurse requesting a CT scan and an appointment after with the doctor for the results.  I also for the past week have felt gassy.  Horrible gassy.  I have been eating about 12 gas x's a day during the course of the day.  My HIV doctor seems to think the tiredness and stomach problems might all tie into the Prostate and we need to get the infection under control.  So now I wait for the nurse to call and most likely tell me something different.  At that point I am not sure what I will do because I am very uncomfortable between the gas and the pain.

As I mentioned earlier, yesterday was a good day.  I got through the first hours and then was able to do 2 miles on the treadmill.  I walked Casper and Bo around the block early morning.  I made grilled cheese sandwiches for Tony when he came home with Rose for lunch and then went for a nice walk in the river trails.  Didn't even take a nap.  I was sleeping by 9 PM exhausted.   So now today I pay the price of doing all that.  One good day, one bad day seems to be my life story lately.

Wish I felt better because we do have a busy weekend coming up with block parties and bike races throughout the neighborhood.  Also a big air show that we can see since we are so close to the lake front where the show is held. 

So there it is.  The HIV meds are keeping me alive, but my body feels like it is giving out.  My Prostate is as bad or worse and I have no clue where I go from here.

July 17, 2015 Friday Morning

Thank you for the positive comment regarding the book Final Exit.  Like I said in the post I am not planning on going anywhere any time soon.  I have five dogs and Tony that need me.

It has not been a good week at all.  Monday I took my last of two months antibiotic for my prostate infection that refuses to go away.  I figured since I thought I had an appointment with my HIV doctor of Wednesday I would see what he has to say before I called back my Prostate doctor.  By Wednesday morning the pain was getting worse and now I was feeling very gassy.  Went grocery shopping Wednesday morning.  Drove quite a distance to my HIV doctor Wednesday afternoon to find out the appointment had been switched months ago to next Wednesday.  When I got home I confirmed I had changed it on one calendar but not the other, which I use to keep up with appointments.  (another one to add to my memory problems)   So I drove home feeling tired, bloated, defeated, and in need of meds for the prostate.  I left a message with my Prostate doctor that I either needed another refill for a month or need to come in and see the doctor.  I half hour after being home I went to the refrigerator for a cherry I had bought earlier to see they are not in the frig.  Started thinking the bags felt light.  I then thankfully still had the receipt to notice about 10 items missing.  Thinking back I then remembered watching the checker bag some items and send the rest down the belt for me to bag.  Everything I bagged I had, everything he bagged he never gave me.  So I then now had to call Pick N Save and have them confirm they had my groceries and come in and get them.  Though, they were put back so I would have to basically shop again.  Drove to the store a second time and got the groceries.  By this time I would in pain, exhausted, and mad as hell.   Called the HIV pharmacy to see if they could get me refills on the antibiotic and anti inflammatory. 

Thursday I spent most of the day in bed.  Tired and just feel like crap.  Pain in my prostate is a 3 on a scale to 10.  Gas is still a problem if I eat, so I guess the diet starts now.  Around 4 PM I called the HIV clinic to see if they got a refill request from my doctor.  When they told me no, I then called the doctor and left a message again asking for refills or an appointment.  A bit later the doctor called to say she faxed the prescriptions yesterday and if in a month not better I would need to come see the doctor.  When I called the HIV clinic to say they must have the fax / prescription refill they kept saying they didn't.  After being put on hold three times they finally found the fax.  WTF?  So I then drove downtown to get the prescriptions and give them a piece of my mind.  I get home with the prescriptions to notice the anti inflammatory says 60 pills and is circled to verify yet there are only 30 pills in the bottle. WTF?  Can this week get any worse?  I then had to call the HIV clinic to find out when I would get the rest of my meds and find out who fucked this up.  I ask for the manager to call me since I have many issues every month with this pharmacy.  From prescription not ready when I get there called in days ahead, to missing pills twice now, to no one ever answering the phone, to faxes not getting addressed and prescription filled .... I have a bone to pick with the ARCW pharmacy.   How can a fax from a doctor sit in limbo for over 24 hours and be told it is not there three times when it is?  Then the wrong amount of pills given out?  Honestly by last night going to bed I could feel the gas coming out and feeling a bit better from the meds again.  I pray this goes away since my next course is a scope up the penis which scares the hell out of me.

Today I woke up feeling like crap and tired.  Pushed myself to do a mile and 3/4 on the treadmill.  It is going to be close to 90 degrees today so I do not know if Tony will join us for lunch since he will be stinky.  Just being honest.  He works outside in this heat if not in the office.  After lunch I will most likely take a nice long nap.  Too hot to do anything outside.  Tonight we see the play Bent which I am looking forward to .  Plan on bringing tissue since I cry at plays like this theme. 

This weekend and into next week looks too hot outside for me.  Will have to think of indoor projects.

July 13, 2015 Monday Afternoon

Summer has finally arrived in Milwaukee.  The past week we have had very Summer like temperatures for a change.  Has been a very cool Summer up until the past week.  Today it is very hot out and I got the little work outside done early so not to be out in the hot humid heat. 

The past weekend was very busy.  Last Thursday started Bastille Days and we went to the festival Thursday and again Friday night.  Both nights we did not stay long but it was nice to get out and not have to cook dinner.  Saturday we had the yearly family pool party for Tony's side of the family the weather was cool on Saturday but we went swimming anyway since it is the one time a year we most likely get to go swimming because someone we know has a pool.  Had a good time at the family event as usual.  Sunday we went to a car show around noon at another festival and then spent the rest of the day at home due to the heat. 

My prostate is still feeling a bit of pain.  I did take the last of my two month antibiotic today.  Someone asked my PSA level.  I don't know the number off the top of my head but do know it has been checked regularly due to my dad having cancer and is within normal range.  I see my HIV doctor this Wednesday and will address the problem with him.  I also was talking with the guys in our Friday lunch and was told I should start taking Florajen 3, a high potency probiotic dietary supplement, due to taking an antibiotic for over two months.  Was told my stomach problems and pain might be more due to my taking antibiotics for so long.  Worth a try and bought a bottle and started taking last Friday.  Will hopefully know soon if it will help.  It has already changed my morning bowels.

Was very tired again today.  Could be from doing a lot over the weekend or the fact we were up early listening to Vito bark and growl at the thunder and lightning that started by 4 AM this morning.  Actually went back to bed for another hour after Tony left for work this morning.  Forced myself not to take a nap this afternoon so I sleep good tonight. 

Not a lot on my schedule this week other than my Wednesday HIV doctor appointment and picking up my prescriptions and food at the pantry at the HIV clinic.  I did buy tickets online this morning for a play at a small theater, called Bent.  From reading the play it does not sound like a happy play but Tony mentioned before he left for work that he read about it in the newspaper this morning and would like to see it.  Got tickets for this Friday nights performance.  It is a very small group theater which I do enjoy just as much as the big productions. 

Dogs are all doing great.  Had to take Rose and Casper to the vet last week to update their Rabies shots and have Casper's ear infection in his left ear this time checked.  Have a feeling we are going to have chronic ear problems with Casper.  Rose still loves going to work and walks with her Uncle Tom.  Yesterday we were walking Rose, Casper and Bo around the block and Tom pulled up in his truck.  Rose went crazy and Tom walked with us around the block, Rose at his side.  She loves her Uncle Tom.  Kali sleeps a lot and Vito just seems to keep going even though he is blind and diabetic. 

Finished the book Final Exit.  I did enjoy it and learned a lot about ending one's life someday.  Don't worry, I am not planning on it any time soon but do want an exit strategy if I get very sick someday.

Mom should call soon for our 4 PM Monday talking on the phone.  I usually have to write a list or I forget to tell her things and then remember when we get off the phone.

Will post my new blood count numbers when I get them this Wednesday. 

July 2, 2015 Thursday Dinner Time

Tony is in the shower so I though I would quickly do a post.

Once again I am so shocked so much time has gone by since my last post.  It has been a very exciting time with the recent supreme court ruling, especially the one making gay marriage legal in all 50 states.  As of this post it looks like there are only a handful of counties in a couple states holding out.  They can not hold out forever.  I can honestly say I could never have imagined this day that gay marriage is legal in the USA.

Got my blood withdrawn the other day for my 6 month check.  I go to my HIV doctor in a couple weeks and will get the results.  I feel pretty good except for the pain I still have in my prostate area.  I am almost at the end of my two months on antibiotics and anti inflammatory for it.  I am scared to death to call the doctor because I know the next thing will be a scope up the penis.  If anyone reading this has had the procedure please let me know if it is as painful as I am imagining.  The pain is on the level of about a 3 on a 1 to 10 scale.  Sometimes I have no pain and sometimes I get a shooting pain down to my balls and up to my belly button.  I know I should not be waiting on this and give plenty of advice to everyone else.  I wish I was not such a baby myself when it comes to medical procedures.  I hate pain.  I know, no one does, but I really am scared to death of this next procedure.  I will call my doctor when the meds are gone if there is still pain.

Went to a couple bar parties over last weekend after the supreme court decision making gay marriage legal.  It was a big celebration and I was in tears many times throughout the weekend.  Like I said before, never in my lifetime. 

The dogs are doing great.  Rose is still happy and ready to go to work with Tony each morning and by noon we figure out a way to get her home, either I go get her or Tony brings her home.  I still have been doing two miles on the treadmill daily with Casper and Bo enjoying butcher bones in the basement with me.  I hope the treadmill makes a difference on this blood test with my cholesterol levels.  I also take Bo and Casper around the block for a walk each morning prior to Rose coming home.  The last few weeks I now take my blind dog Vito for a short walk in the alley also after walking Bo and Casper.  I did it one day a couple weeks ago and now every time we come home from Bo and Casper walk, Vito is dancing in the kitchen wanting to go for one also.  He cant see anything but still enjoys peeing on things and sniffing the air outside.  He will be 12 this August and is also diabetic.  I also go for my walks around the river every few days.  I don't go as often as I did last Summer but still at least twice a week.  I also make a point to walk to the grocery store four long blocks away rather than driving.  I keep telling myself walking kept my grandma alive to live to 98.

Tonight we are meeting a high school friend of Tony's that lives here in the neighborhood.  Meeting for supper and a drink at a local pub a few blocks away.  Half price hamburgers tonight.

The weather in Milwaukee has been a bit colder than normal.  It was only in the 50s today due to the wind off Lake Michigan.  We have had a colder than normal Spring and Summer so far.  I don't mind the 50s or 60s.   In fact I have quite enjoyed the Summer so far.  If I had a pool in the back yard I would most likely feel different.

Happy Fourth of July to all who follow.  I hope to post more often.  Always happy to see comments.