February 12, 2010 Friday Morning

Wednesday night I went to a dinner meeting on Atripla. It is the AIDS cocktail I take so the information is always helpful. Plus it gives me a chance to ask any questions I may have regarding the drug. Was happy I went and had a great dinner. Got home and went to bed around 10 PM.

Yesterday was a very hard day. It started out bad. Got up around 6 AM because I had a 8:30 AM dental appointment. Have to get up at least 2 hours to leaving the house. It takes that long every day for my system to clear out. The first hour or two each day on Atripla is not pleasant. Can not remember the last time I had a good bowel movement in the morning without cramping and diarrhea for the first couple hours. Once I get through the first two hours I am good to go. Well, shortly after I got up Stella got up and could not walk on her front right leg. Since she surgery on her back left leg a couple months ago it made it very hard for her to walk and she was not happy. I can see it in my dogs eyes when they are not happy. Got her outside to see her diarrhea was not any better. So now the vet must be called. I honestly though yesterday might be her last day with me and spent most of the day in tears. Called the vet prior to going to the dentist. Drove to the dentist to find out I have a cavity and a tooth infection. Got a prescription of a mouth wash for the tooth infection and made another appointment to take care of the cavity. They could have done the work right there and then but I had Stella on my mind and just wanted to get back to her. Got home to see her not much better and called the vet to set up an appointment. Made an 11 AM appointment and called Tony to inform him he was coming along and to be home by 10:30 AM. Had a break down on the phone with him since I had reached my limit and reminded him how much I really need his help in times like this. On top of all this the ceiling in our bathroom was leaking again from the upstairs apartment shower. I can only handle so much and ended up taking an anxiety pill which helped. Talked with my sister and mom on the phone, crying the whole time before taking Stella to the vet. Tony got home and we loaded Stella into the car. Of course the minute she saw the leash she started looking better. Took her to the vet and they also could see she was not a happy dog. Took her off one med, put her on another for the diarrhea and was told to start feeding her rice and hamburger meat. I honestly thought and discussed with Tony that this could possibly be 'the time'. Brought her home and made her a big batch to last a few days of rice and hamburger meat. Gave her one of the new pills. She still has to take the Prednisone until we find out how the blood test she got again turns out. Got her resting and I drove quickly to Walgreen's to pick up my mouth wash prescription and a few items. Stella's vet bill was $218. Walgreens got me for another $100. Jeez. Spent the afternoon laying on the floor or couch with Stella comforting her. I did do a little caulking of the bathroom in the afternoon also. Stella had more rice and hamburger for dinner and we went to bed early last night watching TV in the bedroom. Was feeling the tightness in my chest from the day's stress.

This morning Stella looks much happier and much better. She only had to go out once during the night and we both got a good nights sleep. She ate a good breakfast and actually has a happier look in her eyes. Not the scared help me daddy look. She also looks less bloated. Called my mom and sister again to let them know today might be a better day. My sister is going through similar with her dog right now so we cry together and talk about our worthless husbands. Worthless might be a little strong, lets say they run the other way when things like this happen. They could be much more helpful. Guess they just don't have the motherly instincts. Makes me so mad when Tony walks past Stella not even looking down at her and says 'she looks fine'. Yah, if you don't look at the problem there is no problem. What is with husbands? Will spend the morning with the dogs and getting ready for lunch with the guys and then have to make a stop at the bank. Will spend the afternoon with the dogs. Not going anywhere tonight either. This Saturday we are going to a play with Tony's sister and boyfriend. Of course Tony wants to have dinner prior to the play which led to me having to remind him how much time the drive, dinner and play will take and Stella can not be left that long. Why do I have to always be the 'bad guy'? Oh well, we will have to see how it all turns out.