Today is going to be one of my worst days of my life.
Saturday morning while Stella was eating I noticed her head / skull had a 'sink hole' type thing going one between her left eye and left ear. We rushed her to the vet mid morning. Vet looked at her and said to bring her back on Monday at 2:30 PM. I spent the weekend looking on the Internet for what was happening to Stella. Seems the tumor is eating away her cartilage of her skull. From everything I read, there is little that can be done and the things that happen next are not pleasant for her or us. She will soon loose her cognitive skills and bowels. Then seizures and then coma. Sunday morning we saw her cheek now had a 'sink hole' also so things are progressing fast. Tony and I spent the weekend talking, giving Stella all the love we can, and planning for her demise today.
So, at 2:30 PM today Tony and I are taking Stella to the vet to be euthanized. I have been crying all weekend and have to be strong. I hate this part about dog ownership. I just keep telling her how much I love her and how sorry I am that this is the end. Watching the hours go by waiting for this afternoon has been horrible. We will bring her body home to show the other dogs so they have closure. Learned from past dogs this seems best or they just don't know what happened to their puppy friend. Will then take her body tomorrow to get cremated so I have the ashes.
So, today is going to suck. I have to be strong. I am going to have to find the strength to do what is right for my baby and I don't know where I will draw that from. I love you Stella and I am so sorry I have to do this.
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I am so very, very sorry. As a fellow dog owner and lover, I understand completely your sorrow. However, don't cry because it's over; just smile because it happened.
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