February 24, 2009 Tuesday Morning

Woke up and out of bed by 6:30 am and got Tony off to work. Having the usual stomach and bowel problems again today. Hopefully the doctor tomorrow will have some remedy or suggestions. Took my anxiety meds around 8 am this morning because the panic started setting in by then. The little voice, I'm going to strangle him one day. I must admit I am happiest when I am sleeping. At least when I am sleeping I am not thinking about the fact I have AIDS. That can not be good.
Feeling pretty tired and worthless today. Had to ask Tony for some money so I could go grocery shopping this morning. Then this afternoon the two dogs go to the vet and who knows how much that will cost or what we will find out about Stella. Then tomorrow my doctor. So, as soon as I feel able to go out of the house this morning I am going to try to make it through the grocery store and get the grocery shopping done. Pretty f*ckin sad hey?
On a good note. As of today I still have not missed one dose of any of my meds. Not one. On schedule now for over a month and a half without missing a dose. Not easy, but my reality.
I was told I can not miss a dose of my AIDS drugs more than once in a month. And that is even bad. You can not let the virus get strong again. It learns very quickly if you miss more than two doses a month. So, I guess I am doing all I can. Got to brush my teeth and get to the grocery store while I feel I can still perform that task. Sad hey?