June 29, 2010 Tuesday Afternoon

By noon yesterday the bird I found that had hit the window was still alive but could not lift his head. He would try to fly but would just go in circles. I finally called Tony at work and asked him if he could take the bird to the humane society prior to his doctor appointment at 1:30 PM. Not too pleased he did come home and get the bird and take it to the humane society. After watching this bird for 5 hours try to survive I had to have it happen. Even if he did die or had to be killed, the humane society would do it humanely. Picked a big bowl of black berries growing in the yard. Made hamburger helper for dinner with a salad and spent the night watching TV. I love the show Persons Unknown. Had vanilla ice cream and black berries for a late night snack before going to bed.

This morning I got up and drove to the Sears Appliance Outlet Center to look at refrigerators and washing machines. I think I have mentioned our washing machine has been making a horrible noise for at least 6 months and it is time to buy a new one. Our refrigerator has not kept anything below 39 degrees for some time. Both are about 10 years old so it is time to break out the credit card and replace them. After looking at the appliances for over an hour I finally called Tony and asked him to drive out and look at the appliances also because I just could not decide on what to buy. I don't know if it's the medication or what, but I can not make big decisions anymore. We did not find anything in our price range or liking at the outlet center and headed over to Best Buy. Ended up buying a new side by side refrigerator and a side load 4.0 capacity washing machine. Took out the extended 5 year warranty on both against Tony's wishes. I usually don't get the extended warranty but in this case it is not like you can take a washer or refrigerator in to get fixed. I thought it best and since it was going on my credit card, we got the 5 year extended warranty. Ended up spending $1600 in all for the washing machine, refrigerator and warranty. More than I wanted to spend, but had to happen sooner or later. Spent the afternoon wondering if we made the right decision. They both get delivered on Saturday. The refrigerator will be a challenge to get into the kitchen and fit in the spot it is going. A real challenge. I hope it is even possible. We will have to remove doors and moldings to even have a half inch to spare when getting it through the doorways. After I was home for a while my mom called, got some cleaning done and about 3 PM I went to lay down for a short nap with the dogs when Tony came home to get something. His shop is about a mile away from our house. Since he was home I got out of bed and poured myself a cup of coffee and figured the nap was off. He left and went back to work. Read the USA Today and posting this post. We will most likely go to a car show tonight and eat at the show.

June 28, 2010 Monday Morning

Pretty uneventful weekend this past weekend.

Saturday morning Tony fixed the upstairs sink faucet while I cleaned up around our house. Bo is feeling great and you would never know he had surgery the prior day. Spent the afternoon taking a nap with Tony and the dogs. Saturday night we cooked out on the grill. Made hamburgers. I should say hamburger. After taking Tony's hamburger off the grill I left mine on to cook it more. When I went to flip it it fell through the grates of the grill and was not something that could be eaten anymore. So I had a bite or two of Tony's burger and a lot of Mac and Cheese. Went across the alley and had a drink with the neighbors for about an hour. Spent the rest of the night watching TV.

Sunday morning around 4 AM another big storm blew through Milwaukee. At one point I thought we were going to loose the car canape to the wind. I made breakfast and it rained until about mid afternoon. We did go to a car show in the drizzle and then to Bayshore mall to get a watch battery. Ended up getting a new battery and buying a new inexpensive watch as a spare for casual occasions. Then went to Kohl's so Tony could be a couple pairs of tennis shoes. I ended up buying two pair of shorts and two shirts. Got home and spent the rest of the day with the dogs sitting in the side yard. Ordered delivery food for dinner and went to bed around 10 AM.

Today Tony took my car to work and is doing some repairs on it. Since the other car at home right now is stick, and I do not drive stick, I am stuck at home for the day. Did my morning routine. Found a baby bird that most have hit one of the windows. It is still alive 3 hours later. I have him laying outside in a shoe box and a towel. So sad to watch him die. I am hoping he makes it but it does not look good. Looks like he broke his neck. I keep looking out the window at him hoping he would just die. Hate to watch him suffer so. Nature is so cruel. I would put him out of his misery if I knew a way to do it and was sure he wasn't going to live. I put the box in the front yard near the bird feeder so hopefully his birdy friends can help him or at least not have to die alone. Wish there was more I could do. Have some projects to do around the house. My black berries are huge this year and started picking a bowl in the morning and than again at night since Saturday. I am freezing half for later use. So far I have put them in ice cream and cereal. Have to get going or I will want to nap soon. Hope my bird doesn't suffer much longer.

June 25, 2010 Friday Night

Picked Bo up today from the vet around 3:10 PM. Talk about being happy to see me. As the nurse brought him through the door he started crying and whimpering so loud everyone in the room turned around. He curled up in my arms and just whimpered loudly as if to say how happy he was to see me. He was so happy to see his daddy. This was the first time since we got Bo that he has been away from the house, his puppy friends and his daddies. I think he must have thought I was leaving him at the vet or he was going to a new home. Talk about feeling needed and appreciated. Funny how a dog or pet can make a person feel very needed. He cried all the way home and into the house until he saw his puppy friends and then he was even happier, if that is possible. I laid him on a pillow and laid next to him and he licked and licked me giving me kisses. By 7 PM he had already peed, pooped, ate dinner, and wants to play with his balls, tennis balls that is. Too funny, he has not let these two balls out of his sight since he got home. He doesn't know which one to play with. It's like he knows he lost his today. LOL The other dogs have been so good. Stella and Vito laid next to him for a while to comfort him after he got home and laying on the pillow. The picture to the right is Bo today, not letting these two balls get away from him. LOL

June 25, 2010 Friday Morning

Feeling a little sad for my sister today.

Thursday morning the vet called to remind me about Bo going in to be neutered on Friday, no food or water after 10 PM tonight. While I had them on the phone I asked if there was any appointments for today to get Barkley's toe nails trimmed. Got Barkley to the vet at 11 AM and had his nails trimmed. Spent the afternoon taking a nap. Even though my tooth is feeling better I still am very tired and have taken couple hour naps all this week in the afternoon. I think my sinus infection is finally going away also. Made a canned ham, mashed potato's and corn for dinner with a side salad. We were going to ride our bikes to the Big Bang Fireworks which we thought started at 10:30 PM. At 9:30 PM we could hear they had already started so we did not get to go to them. All week long the news reports said the fireworks were at 10:30 PM. I think they started them early because there was a very bad accident near there, at the entrance to the Summerfest grounds, on the first day of Summerfest here in Milwaukee. A portion of the brick wall on one of the parking structure collapsed and killed one person, injuring two others. So sad. Had most of the streets blocked for the night which had to make it a nightmare to get down to the lakefront or Summerfest. Went to bed around 11 PM.

This morning I tried like heck to stay in bed at least until 7 AM knowing I could not feed 4 out of 5 dogs and had to have Bo to the vet at 7:30 AM this morning for his neutering. No such luck, got up at 6 AM and watched them stare at me until 7:30 AM. Got home from dropping him off, fed the other dogs and saw a message from my sister. Her dog Breezy has been sick for a long time and she has spent a small fortune trying to keep him alive. She called to let me know this afternoon at 2 PM she was going to be euthanizing him. So sad. Has made me cry all morning since calling her to say how sorry I am to hear the news. It brings back all the pain of my four dogs I have had to euthanize. I know it is never easy. I still have so many regrets about my first one I euthanized. It should not have been done that day. Shadow deserved better. I sure hope there is a heaven so I can see my puppies again some day. On that note, my mom gave me a new book to read last Sunday called Heaven and the Afterlife. I am up to chapter 5 and it is very good. Talks about people who have had near death experiences. Very interesting reading. Going to pick Tony up soon to go have lunch with the guys. Then I will pick Bo up at the vet sometime after 3 PM. The vet did call to let me know a little while ago that he made it through surgery OK. After I get Bo I am sure I will spend the rest of the day and night comforting him on the couch or floor depending on how he is recovering. He hated me leaving him this morning and I hated leaving him also. I bet he thinks his time here is over. I kept telling him I would be back to get him and that this was his home forever and how much I loved him. Poor thing. He will be in pain and need his puppy friends and daddies love tonight. Looks like rain this weekend. It has been hot and the air conditioning on the last few days. Don't look like it is going off any time soon. Tony does need to fix the upstairs tenant's sink faucet this weekend. It is leaking. Other than that the weekend is clear to spend time with Bo.

June 23, 2010 Wednesday Morning

Ended up going to the car show at the Harley Davidson Museum and then stopping at a restaurant near by for some dinner. Spent the night watching America's Got Talent and went to bed at 10 PM because another round of storms was to come through Milwaukee around 3 AM according to the weather news.

At 3:30 AM it was like the world was coming to an end. The storm hit very fast. Kali was a basket case panting and shaking, Vito stood up in the window and barked at mother nature every time it thundered. It was funny to see Vito curse mother nature with each thunder. I did go out on the side porch for a while to watch until a HUGE lightening and then thunder actually scared me back into the house. It was right over our house and I was actually blinded for a second. Heard the dogs crying in the bedroom even though Tony was still in bed with them so I headed back to the bedroom to give them some comfort. The storm lasted about an hour. Heavy rain, huge lightening and loud thunder. Got back to bed for a while before getting up and feeding the dogs and getting Tony off to work. My tooth is feeling a bit better. I was able to just take two Motrin at 3:30 AM and the pain did go away. This morning I took 1 Motrin and a half a pain pill. Seems to have helped. It seems I am at least cutting down the pain medication to half and the time needing them has gone from 3 hours to 6 hours. So I hope in time it will get even better. I am sure the antibiotic is also helping since today is the third day. Have to go to Walgreen's at some point today to pick up a couple prescriptions. Around dinner time and early evening we are suppose to get another round of storms with a cold front coming through. I am sure I will end up making dinner because we will not want to go outside during that next round of storms. Plus the dogs need me. Tony found a Play Station 3 with a few games so I might hook that up and see what it does. I am not a big video game player at all so I am not sure how much I will enjoy it. I just can not think fast enough to play most video games. Give me Pong and Pac Man and I am fine. One game is Frogger, which I have played in the past. Tony's eye is feeling better and he can actually see things with the new lens they put in his left eye. Each day it should heal more and his sight get better. Other than that, just have to do a little yard clean up from all the branches and leaves that have fallen in the yard from the storms. It was confirmed that 3 tornadoes did hit our area the other night. Lots of damage in those parts of the city. Thankfully we just got a big storm and no major damage.

June 22, 2010 Tuesday Afternoon

Last night we had some huge storms roll through Milwaukee around 10 PM. The tornado sirens went off and everything. There was so much lightning and thunder. Even had a couple tornado's west of Milwaukee. I love storms. When I heard the tornado sirens going off I headed upstairs to the back deck to see the storm arrive. My tenant was on his way down the stairs to the basement. He laughed when he saw me heading to higher ground rather than lower ground. My dentist did end up calling late in the day and made an appointment to go back to the dentist early Tuesday morning. Tony spent the night in pain also because of his eye surgery.

This morning I got up early so I could be at the dentist by 9 AM. Woke up around 3 AM to take another round of pain pills last night. You know the pain is bad when it wakes you up from a sound sleep. At the dentist they put clove oil on the socket. It did help at the time. By 2:30 PM this afternoon I had to take another round of pain pills because the pain had returned. Jeez, I am about at my wits end with this pain. Tony's eye was a little better today and he had an 11 AM appointment to have it checked from the surgery the day before. Took a short nap before being waken at 2:30 PM this afternoon from the pain. Very hot in Milwaukee today. In the high 80's. We are suppose to get another round of big storms in the middle of tonight. Some might be severe again we are being told on the news. Have to do a little cleaning before Tony comes home from work. We will most likely go to a car show at The Harley Davidson Museum tonight and grab dinner at the car show. I am sure Tony will be tired and sleeping early tonight since he was up a lot last night also from his eye pain. I could sleep all day lately. Not getting a full nights rest in over a week from being woken every 4 or so hours because of the tooth pain hasn't helped.

June 21, 2010 Monday Afternoon

Still in a lot of pain and taking pain pills every four hours as of today.

Saturday night the pain was so bad I got very little sleep. Sunday morning I went to the Walk In Clinic at Walgreen's that opened at 9:30 AM. Got another antibiotic for the tooth infection. Doctor gave me Amox-Clavin 875MG twice daily. Got home by 11 AM and laid down for an hour before leaving to have lunch with Mom and Dad for Father's Day. Had a great all you can eat brunch at Thunder Mountain in Waukasha. Since my parents have taken Tony and I out for dinner and lunch many times we picked up the check. When my dad asked for the check and I said I had taken care of it already, the look on his face was priceless. I am glad we did. Came home and watched the movie Date Night with Tina Fey. It was funny. Ended up going to bed, or trying, around 8 PM. Finally gave up and watched a little TV until 11 PM when the next round of pain pills kicked in.

This morning I had to have Tony at the eye doctor at 7 AM so he could have eye surgery, a lens put in his eye. He damaged it over 25 years ago and has not been able to see through it since. Sat around waiting to drive him home. After we got home the pain in his eye started to be pretty painful. He has spent most of the afternoon in bed, his eye watering, as I did cleaning around the house. I then worked on filling the pond and fixing any low spots where the water was leaking out. Waiting for a call from my dentist that pulled the tooth last Monday to talk to him about the pain I still have. The pain is horrible and I am now putting Oral Gel on it too to dull the pain. I can not keep living on pain pills, Advil and oral gel. I am not holding my breath that he will call today and most likely I will have to call the dentist again this morning. Hoping the antibiotic kicks in soon and the infection in the tooth behind where I had the tooth pulled starts to go away. I can not even touch the last tooth in my mouth it is so painful. Tony is now in the living room and also in pain. What a pair we are hey? Most likely Tony will not even go into work to close the shop he looks so much in pain. Will make a nice dinner and hopefully go to bed early tonight. Anyone else ever have a tooth pulled, get dry socket and an infection so you can let me know how long I can expect this pain in my mouth to last?

June 19, 2010 Saturday Morning

Dry Socket is a BITCH!
I should have gone back to the dentist on Thursday or Friday and now I am so sorry I didn't. My mouth hurts so much I am ready to scream. I get this every time I have a tooth pulled.

Thursday I spent the morning sleeping or watching the CNN interview with BP CEO. Went to my board meeting in the afternoon and came home and did a little cleaning. Ended up going out to dinner with the neighbors for Dining Out For Life at a restaurant down the road called The Tracks. Had a nice burger. Eating is just not fun with this mouth and tooth pain.

Friday I once again spent the morning holding my mouth from the pain. I did end up going to lunch with the guys and then grocery shopping. Spent the rest of the afternoon watching TV trying to make it through the day. Didn't even make supper last night. We did end up watching the movie The Bounty Hunter. It was OK. Went to bed with thunderstorms here in Milwaukee. Not easy to sleep from the pain. I do hope this sinus infection ends soon also.

This morning I woke up in more pain from the dry socket. I woke up dripping wet which I hope is a good sign my sinus infection is breaking. Just wish this mouth pain would go away. I am so miserable I don't know what to do. I wish they sold something over the counter at the drug store for dry socket, but they do not. Going to take another round of pain pills to get through the afternoon. No plans this weekend. It is nice here in Milwaukee weather wise. Tomorrow we will at some point drive to my parents house to wish my father a Happy Fathers Day.

June 17, 2010 Thursday Morning

Monday I spent the day taking pain pills and Motrin to dull the pain form getting the tooth removed. Thank goodness for pain pills or I would have been in bad shape. Spent the night watching TV and just trying to keep it together from the pain.

Tuesday was another day of managing the pain. Realized it was better to take another pain pill and Motrin prior to, or when I felt any pain, than to wait too long. Did some cleaning around the house and watched a lot of TV. Eating has not been fun at all. Took another round of pills and went to bed early.

Wednesday I had to get some things done that were piling up. Cleaned the pond pump. Took Stella to the vet for a toe nail clipping at 2 PM. Was able to make it through the day only taking 3 pain pills throughout the day. Went out for dinner at BBC for cheap burgers and fries. Watched the movie The Human Centipede. It was very good. If you like that kind of movie.

This morning my tooth is killing me. Just took a round of pills to hopefully make this throbbing stop. I have to cut the little grass we have in the front yard and then go to a board meeting this afternoon at ARCW. Today is Dining Out For Life here in Milwaukee. Local restaurants give a percent of the bill to AIDS. We will most likely go to a local restaurant taking part for dinner tonight. Feeling a bit tired today. Didn't sleep well last night. I hope my pulled tooth is not getting infected because it hurts like hell this morning. It didn't help that Bo started licking my face at 2 AM which ment he wanted to go outside. Was hard to get back to sleep after that. Might just take a little nap after I cut the grass and before my afternoon meeting. Will most likely pick up my monthly food allotment when I am at ARCW for my meeting.

The Early Years - Part 2 - The First Time

I remember the night well. I was 10 years old. One night while my parents were at the neighbors house, the neighbor's son was at our house. The two of us were in the basement bedroom. The lights were not on but there still was light in the bedroom. I remember him laying on the bed, the bottom bunk bed, and removing his penis. He then told me to put my mouth around it because it would feel 'so good'. I remember putting my mouth around his penis and then running to the bathroom and taking a bar of soap and rubbing it in my mouth to get rid of the taste of his penis. The soap got all over my teeth and it took a while to get the soap out of my mouth. The soap tasted worse than penis. That was the first time, but not the last. In time, another night, he had me put my mouth around his penis again and this time instructed me how to suck on it. I was so young I had no idea what I was doing. All I knew was that he wanted to spend time with me. We must have somehow knew deep down it was 'wrong' or we would not have hid the act? All I knew was that a guy older than me wanted to spend time with me and be my 'friend'. These encounters continued. In the beginning, since he was only 14, he didn't even cum. I remember the first time he came in my mouth I asked him what that 'stuff' was. He said he didn't know and couldn't stop it from coming out. I honestly believed him because we all led such a sheltered life that neither one of us honest knew why or what was coming out of his penis when I would suck it. For a long time he would promise not to have the 'stuff' come out if I sucked on him. I believed him and of course, depending on how long we were together, depended on whether he would cum or not. Each time he promised me that he would not let the 'stuff' come out. This continued until I was 15 years old and he was 19 years old. Throughout those years we would do anything to try to find time together so he could have me suck on his penis. During the summer we would play a hiding game called Bloody Murder where you hide in the woods and others try to find you as you hide. He always wanted to play this game with me his partner so when we hid in the woods waiting for others to find us I could suck on him. After about a year or so he then thought it would be fun to have me give oral sex to two of his friends also. Those times with his friends were not as frequent as with him. We would hide in our tree house or forts we built in the yard, or I would sneak over to his house when mom was busy in the kitchen and I saw he was home alone. One time when we went up north on a family camping trip with the neighbors I wanted to sleep in the car with him. My parents were against it but I snuck out of the car I was sleeping in as my parents slept in the cabin. When my parents found me sleeping in his car the next morning it turned into a big fight and we left the camping trip early and returned home. I do not know if my parents knew what was going on but they knew 'something' was going on and wanted it to stop. When I was 15 and he went to college I waited for him to come home for summer vacation or breaks so we could get together. My mother was very careful not to have me ever be with him alone even though I know she had no clue what was happening. She didn't think it was right for me at 15 years old to be hanging out with a guy 4 years older than me. I remember the last summer, his second in college, he had a girl friend and that was the first time he told me we could not keep doing 'this'. I was disappointed and felt pushed to the side. I honestly still at this age never put two and two together and considered this sex. It was more a way for me to be accepted and be able to play with the older guys since I did not have friends of my own in the neighborhood. I obviously did enjoy it as much as him since I would initiate the act just as much as him, me more so in the end. Never was this ever about me cumming, it was always about me pleasing him, and him cumming. I could hang out with the older guys if I sucked on their penis's. Plus, my mom was constantly telling me that girls were bad and they will get pregnant. What was I to do? Girls were bad, guys let me hang with them.
I have often thought how did he know to have me do this to him unless he had someone show him this when he was very young. We had no porn or anything so how else would he know to have another guy put their mouth around his penis when he was 14 years old.
I now found myself about 15 with no other guys to be with because they were all in college. One time that fall when we were in Florida on a family trip I guess you would say I picked up my first guy. I remember being on the beach just before dark and a handsome, dark haired college kid walked up to me. We started talking. I am not sure where I got the nerve, but I soon started telling him I was 'into different things'. I remember him asking over and over again what 'different things' I was into. I finally told him I like to suck on a guys penis. There was no words like 'oral sex' in my vocabulary at that time. I don't even think it was called that back then. I honestly can not believe I was so forward. He said he knew of a place at the end of the beach in the park we could go to. We walked all the way to the park. He pulled out his penis and I dropped to my knees and sucked on it to completion. When I was done I stood up and he said to me, I remember it well, he said 'don't forget about the girls'. LOL. What the heck does that mean?
I spent my high school years very confused. By the time I became a junior in high school I needed to find a man to have sex with, even though I had a 'pretend girlfriend'. This is what led to me trying to get together with my drivers education teacher, getting caught writing him letters, the school principal having me see a school psychologist, and eventually having to tell my father about the whole incident, including the neighbor boys. I will save this story for part 3. These next few years were the worst of my life.

June 14, 2010 Monday Afternoon

Had for the most part a great weekend. I was not only battling a sinus infection all weekend but a major tooth ache also. Spent the weekend taking Advil Cold and Sinus and pain pills to get through the weekend. We spent Friday night at Pridefest and caught half the Kathy Griffin. She was funny but we were so beat we left half way through her show. She was to come on stage at 10 PM but did not come on until 11:20. Bullshit! She started the show off in her usual style by saying "How the Fuck are you Milwaukee" and the curse words continued. She was funny.

Saturday we went down to Pridefest for the afternoon. Came home and fed the dogs and headed back down to the festival around 7 PM. Ended up closing down the place with Patti LaBelle. She was awesome.

Sunday we had so much going on. Between Locust Street Festival, Pridefest, The Air Show and the Pridefest Parade we were on the go all day going from event to event. We never did make it back to Pridefest on Sunday. Spent the morning watching the Beer Run at Locust Street Festival and stayed until about 1:30 PM. Then headed home, let the dogs out and went to the Pridefest Parade that started at 2 PM. Got home shortly after 4 PM and went back to the Locust Street Festival. We were able to watch the Air Show because the planes flew right over the parade route as they put on their show. Got home from Locust Street festival around 6 PM and between my feet killing me, my sinus's killing me and my tooth killing me we stayed home for the night. Was a good plan because it rained during Joan Rivers on Sunday night. Would not want to watch her show sitting in the rain. Tried to go to bed at 10 PM but was up most of the night with the tooth pain. The tooth was throbbing painfully.

This morning I went to ARCW to wait and see if they could see me at the dentist office. I do have a dental appointment there on Wednesday to get a cavity filled but his pain can not wait. I have had problems with this tooth for so long. It has already had root canals and had a crown. So, I had them pull it. Just told them to get rid of it. Got home a short time ago and went right for the pain pills. I know in time it will hurt. Will spend the afternoon watching TV trying to get the tooth to stop bleeding with gauze in my mouth, not fun. My face still feels puffy from the shots. I am sure it will wear off soon. Pridefest broke all attendance records this year each of the three days. Each year it gets bigger and bigger. It is the only Pridefest in the world with over 150 bands and events scheduled all weekend long. Milwaukee always pulls in the big starts for the even and this year was no different. Off to the couch for the afternoon.

June 11, 2010 Friday Afternoon

Happy Milwaukee Pridefest Weekend!

I am so excited about this weekend. Between Milwaukee Pridefest, the Milwaukee Air Show, and the Locust Street Block Party (two blocks away on Sunday), it should be a great weekend. I only wish I did not have this damn sinus infection. Went to bed the last two nights with a splitting headache from it. I did start an antibiotic yesterday so hopefully the whole weekend my face will not hurt like it does now. Didn't have lunch with the guys today since one of them is out of town and Tony had two doctor appointments today. Since I will see the guys this weekend at Pridefest all should be good. In about an hour the Air Show begins. I plan on being up on my second floor deck watching it all this afternoon. Tonight if it doesn't rain we will go to Pridefest at the Milwaukee lakefront. Might not get online before Monday to post again so I wish everyone a terrific weekend.

June 10, 2010 Thursday Evening

Went grocery shopping in the morning prior to lunch. Around noon the Blue Angels started practicing for the Air Show along the Milwaukee Lakefront this Friday, Saturday and Sunday. They took a break mid afternoon and returned for about an hour from 3 PM to 4 PM to continue practicing. The noise is soooo loud as they go over the house. They fly so low over the house you can even read the US Army written on the bottom of the plane. It is awesome. Kali was scared to death and I finally had to close all the windows and turn the stereo up real loud which did not help much. The other dogs didn't seem to mind as much. I honestly thought Kali was going to have a heart attach she was panting so hard. She just panted and shook every time the planes flew over the house. I took a bunch of pictures and posted the best two below. At one point 6 planes were all flying in formation. So cool.

June 10, 2010 Thursday Morning

Took an afternoon nap yesterday. Tony got home early from work, still not feeling so good. We did end up going to a car show and then dinner at Culver's. When we got home we watched the movie I Love You Phillip Morris with Jim Carey and Ewan McGregor. It was very good. It is a shame this movie will never be released in the states. If anyone wants a copy on DVD let me know via email at djones2659@att.net and we will work something out. Went to bed around 10 PM because I had a pounding headache.

This morning I got up and did the morning routine. I think I am getting a sinus infection so I just started an antibiotic of Levaquin. Tony made a doctor appointment for tomorrow since he doesn't feel much better today. Already cut the little grass we have between the street and sidewalk. Takes less than 15 minutes to do. I am showered and soon will be going grocery shopping. It is in the 70s today in Milwaukee. Very comfortable. I do think I might take a nap again this afternoon. I can not be sick this weekend with Pridefest taking place.

The Early Years - Part 1 - A Little Background Info

I was born in Milwaukee Wisconsin April 23, 1961 about 10:30 AM. I remember things back when I was the age of five. At about that age my parents decided to move from the city of Milwaukee to the suburbs of Sussex. They thought it was best to move out of the city because Milwaukee was in a turning point racially. Plus, my sister was born and we needed a bigger house. When we moved to Sussex it was a small town. It is much different today. I remember viewing the house in Sussex with my parents for the first time prior to buying it. I was 5. When we went to see the house for the first time prior to buying it it had a steep mud driveway and our car got stuck in the driveway when we went to the house that night. It was a nice big house in a very upscale subdivision at the time. It was a full acre of land. When you told people you lived in Wooded Hills, they were impressed. It was the 'place to live'. I had for the most part a pretty good childhood. We were the first to get a 25 inch color TV, we were the first to have a big pool in the back yard. We were the envy of most. But they could not see what was happening inside the house away from the public.
I did not feel I ever fit in during my school years. I had friends but something never clicked. Being the middle kid I was always told from my teachers that I was always 'seeking attention'. I guess it might have been true. I think growing up I did not know how to be a friend with a guy since I deep down had feelings for them. I could not separate friendship from wanting love or affection. I did good in school. I got some A's, mostly B's, and a few C's. I was creative and enjoyed playing with blocks and building things. Growing up my parents were very protective. We very not allowed to watch a lot of TV. I remember not being able to watch Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman, Soap, Dark Shadows, Three's Company, to name a few shows. Friday night was called 'treat night'. We were not allowed to snack during the day so Friday Treat Night we could have ice cream or pop corn, or something 'special' like that. Funny hey? But it kept the family close. I was not allowed to wear blue jeans to school even throughout high school. My dad worked very hard running his Tool and Die company. He would leave for work by 6:30 AM and not get home until 6:30 PM Monday through Friday. We did not see him much during the week. Mom fed us kids at 5 PM sharp and dad ate alone after he got home. No such thing as a microwave oven back then. How did mom do it? On Saturday's Dad would try to take us kids to the shop to clean the equipment and machines. Of course this was not fun at all and remember being forced many times to go. It was dirty and greasy. My dad worked very hard to provide for our family and did so. My mom worked very hard to keep the family together and the house in order. With 5 kids she had her hands full. We went on family trips each year. I remember the trips to Florida, California, Colorado, South Dakota, and many more. We were the first of our friends to ride in a jet at the time. People didn't fly at the drop of a hat like they do today. You were privileged if you got to go on a jet plane. You could even smoke on airplanes back then and they had an ash tray between each seat. I spent the summers swimming in the pool. We even had a diving board and slide. I spent winters snowmobiling and playing in the snow making snow forts. We always had at least 2 snowmobiles. I guess you could compare us to the Brady Bunch in a way. Or so it seemed. What you couldn't see was there also. My mom was very conservative when it came to sex. I was not even allowed to go to a high school dance out of fear I might get a girl pregnant. Yah, it could be a reason I turned out gay. Girls were bad, they will get pregnant and your life is over, I remember hearing often. No College if you get a girl pregnant. I remember once having a crush on a girl in grade school and when my mom found out about it I was told I could never see her again. My mom was raped as a child which I think led to a lot of her hang ups with sex. We were not even allowed to look at a naked woman or anything that was close. Sex was 'bad'. Even in high school my senior year I had to sneak to see the girl I was dating.
Family events were hard because I never had anyone my age to hang with. My two older brothers had cousins their ages. I had no one. So at family events they did their thing and I always got into trouble. Don't get me wrong when I talk about my parents. I love them dearly, they did the best they could with what they had learned. I do not fault my parents for anything and know they always did what was best for us kids. Us kids came first. Heck, what parents today would drag 5 kids every year on a two week vacation? What kind of vacation could that have been for them?
I hated the bus ride to school and back each day. I got picked on and never fit in. I was so happy in high school to be able to finally drive to school each day. I don't know how I made it though my grade school, middle school, and high school years. I honestly do not remember much good about school. I got picked on all the time. I bonded with teachers most. I did not make or keep friends very well. My worst memories are of Gym class. I hated Gym class. Getting picked last or close to last and not enjoying anything rough was not good for a kid growing up. I was not good at sports and hated them. In high school I missed half the year of Gym class due to my braces on my teeth and having mom schedule appointments at that time of school, and taking me out of school for them. Thank goodness for braces, they got me out of Gym class. One time in high school I remember refusing to play Battle Ball. Jeez, you just get hit by balls. It is the most barbaric sport I know. I walked out of Gym and went to the principles office and told them to call my mom. I was not going to play. I could not catch a ball and always got hit and hurt. My mom did take my side and I never had to play Battle Ball again. I was allowed to write reports, go to the library, or keep score. I am sure this didn't win me any points with the guys either. I stood up for what I believed in. I got involved in the theater in high school. I even had the lead character in two plays. I did enjoy them. It got me out of the house at night for rehearsals and I met people more similar to me. Even through high school, even though I was having sex with men, I never really saw myself as gay. How could I? The only gay character I saw on TV my teen years was on the show Soap, and I wasn't allowed to watch it unless they were not home or I did it while mom was upstairs busy. Much less the sex I had with men was more about 'fitting in' or being able to be with them since I had no one to hang out with. I will talk more about this in Part 2.
At 16 I got a job as a stock man at Kmart. I soon worked my way up to having a position in the Toy department which eventually, my senior year, I was head of the Toy and Hobby Department at Kmart in Menomonee Falls. I liked working. It was good. It was hard to balance the theater and a full time job but I did it. I had half days at school and started work at Kmart by 3 PM in the afternoon. All was good until the girl I was dating started working there my senior year. We broke up, and working together was not good when she paraded her new boy friend through the store on her days off. I returned to Kmart my first two summers of college and worked in the outside patio department. It was a needed summer job. My last summer there when I was in college the rumors were starting to fly that I was gay so I never went back after my sophomore year in college.
So what is gay? When did I know I was gay? When did I admit I was gay? Does it start the day you have your first man on man experience? If that is the case, I was 10 years old. I will save this story for Part 2.

June 9, 2010 Wednesday Morning

Yesterday it rained all day. All day from the time I got up until going to bed. It was still raining when I went to bed. Yuck! I got up yesterday hungry so after Tony left for work I got in the car and drove to Mc Donald's to get some breakfast. Ordered the usual, a bacon egg cheese bagel and a sausage burrito. After I got home and ate it all I went back to bed. Slept until about noon and then got up to start cleaning the house a little and get myself showered so I could pick up my high school buddy at Tony's shop at 2:30. He was getting his mirror fixed by Tony so I thought I would bring him by and show him the house. We had not been in contact since high school and just started talking again since my high school reunion last fall. Picked him up and brought him to the house in the rain. We sat around and talked for about an hour about life today and life back in high school. At times the conversation dried up. Thankfully I am good at keeping a conversation rolling or there would not have been much to talk about. We went in different directions. He is in the middle of a divorce after 24 years of marriage. Has 3 kids. He does not know of my HIV status and best to keep it that way. After a long hour Tony called to say the mirror was installed and the car ready to pick up so I drove him back to Tony's auto body shop. We said our goodbye's and said we should keep in touch. Got home and had no energy to cook dinner. Ended up making a salad and a frozen pizza after Tony got home from work. Ended up watching TV the rest of the night. Still raining all night here in Milwaukee. Found a new web sight to download movies. Downloaded the movie I Love You Phillip Morris. It has yet to be released in the United States. Looks like a good copy and we will watch it possibly tonight. It starts Jim Carey as a gay guy. Guess there is a lot of man on man action. Most of the movie is about him being in prison I am told and falling in love with his cell mate. I will let you know how it is after we watch. If anyone wants a copy on DVD let me know via email and we can work something out. It does not look like this movie will ever be released in the United States from what I read. Tony is getting a cold so he is not so happy. I had hoped I would not get it, but I have a feeling today I might be.

Woke up this morning feeling a little under the weather. I hope I am not getting Tony's chest and sinus cold. This weekend is Pridefest and I Will Not Be Sick. The sun is out so that will help today. I do not have anything on my schedule today. I was thinking the last week or so about adding a new feature to the web sight. The story of my younger life. Telling when I thought I was gay and the things that happened along the way as I grew up. It might be hard to read at times but I will be honest. I have said many times that if I had to live life over I would not change much. I feel everything I have gone through in my life is not only interesting, but could help someone else along the way. Look for the series to begin soon. I think I will call it The Early Years and add a bit each day or so. Hopefully the Blue Angel jets will be practicing today for the air show at the lake front this weekend. It is so cool to watch them fly over the house practicing. We have this air show every year here in Milwaukee. It usually doesn't land on Pridefest weekend which is at the lake front also. So it will make Pridefest even better. The air show is right over the festival grounds. Joan Rivers, Brice Vilanch, Patti LaBelle and Kathy Griffin are the headliners of Pridefest this year in Milwaukee. Pretty good people for Milwaukee. Hoping the weather is good this weekend. It looks like a heat wave is coming and will be in the 90s on Saturday. Rain on Sunday. Time will tell. It is always so sad when it rains the weekend of Pridefest making for not a very successful festival. We have been lucky the last few years and had at least 2 out of 3 good days for the 3 day festival. Should go do a little house work. Hopefully I will be back to start the Early Years Series later today.

June 7, 2010 Monday Dinner Time

Saturday the weather started out very nice. Went to a car show around lunch time on the south side of Milwaukee. Knew the weather was going to take a change for the bad so we got home prior to the rain beginning. We then started trimming the back yard tree with the help of our tenant who cuts down trees for a living. We got a lot taken off the tree before the rain started coming down very hard. Got it all cleaned up and spend the rest of the night in the house, out of the rain, watching TV. Taking care of a friends dog for the weekend, so we have 6 dogs running around the house.

Sunday morning we were up early so we drove to the south side of town to take Tony's mom out for breakfast. Had a big breakfast, dropped her off and headed home. After we got home I started again cleaning up the back yard from all the branches and leaves we cut down the prior day. That got Tony in a cutting mood and he spent about an hour or more trimming the front trees that hang over the cars in our front yard. He did a lot of trimming. I at one point had to make him stop or there would be no bushes or trees left. LOL. We then took an hour nap. After our nap we went for a drive again along the Milwaukee lake front. We brought Kali with us this time. She loves being with her daddy. She sits in a dog chair between Tony and I. It is high enough for her to see out the front window so as long as she is next to her daddy she is a happy girl. Stopped off for an ice cream cone at Dairy Queen. I think Kali eat most of my ice cream. She was so cut. She would start off licking which would soon turn to biting a huge part of the ice cream. I am surprised she didn't get an ice cream headache. Drove home. It started raining about a mile from home. Got home and spent the rest of the day watching the rain fall and watching TV. We ended up watching the movie Avatar. I loved the movie. Tony was confused and did not like it as much.

This morning I got up ready to enter a post into the blog. Blogger was down all day until today so I got the idea to transfer my year and a half posts to a word document, day by day. I got up to July 2009 before deciding to lay down for a short nap. Turned into an hour and a half nap. Did a little cleaning since the 6th dog was picked up shortly before 1 PM this afternoon. I love the dog and all but he sheds horribly. Long white hair everywhere. Making a meat loaf, mashed potato and corn for dinner. Tony wasn't feeling so well when he left for work this morning so I am sure when he gets home he will want to eat and be sleeping on the couch by 8 PM tonight. Not much on TV so I do not know what we will watch tonight. Should be good sleeping weather tonight since it only got in the 70s today and most likely will be in the low 60s and less humid tonight.

Tuesday a buddy from high school that I have seen once since graduation, at our 25th reunion, is coming into town to have Tony replace his broken car mirror. While Tony is working on the car I am going to bring him home to the house to introduce him to the dogs and show him the house. Other than that I do not have a lot going on this week.

June 4, 2010 Friday Afternoon

I have no idea what I did on Wednesday. LOL. I do know by dinner time it was raining so I was forced to make dinner since there are no car shows when it rains. I'm sitting here trying to remember what I even made for dinner and have no clue. Wow. Kinda scary.

Thursday I woke up and after eating breakfast I was drinking a class of cold water when one of my lower teeth almost sent me to the ceiling. I was just at the dentist on Monday so going back was not a happy thought. I called to make an appointment to have it checked and was surprised when they told me they could get me in Friday morning at 9 AM. That is a bit early for me in the morning but I thought it best to take the time or I might be sorry and have to wait until late next week. Went grocery shopping in the afternoon and bought about $40 of fruit. I love this time of year because of all the fruit is in season. Ended up buying strawberries, grapes, water melon, and a big bag of cherries. Of course I had $54 on me and the total came to $57 so I ended up putting the total on the credit card. I thought I budgeted better in my head as I went through the aisles and was not going to pick and choose what to put back to take off the total. After putting everything away I took a nap for about an hour. After I got up I did a little cleaning around the house. Made hamburgers and rice with a big salad for dinner. Ended up watching a bunch of stuff on the DVR all night since there was nothing on TV but reruns. Went to bed around 10 PM.

This morning I forced myself out of bed around 6 AM so I would be ready to leave by 8:30 for my 9 AM dental appointment. It was cloudy and rainy all morning which made it very had to do anything. Xrays were taken and it looks like I do have a cracked tooth. Made an appointment for the middle of June to have it fixed. Got home and watched a little CNN about the oil leak before picking Tony up to go have lunch with the guys. After lunch I prepared for the 6th dog. Yup, we are taking care of a friends dog for the weekend. The dog has been here many times before. He is 16 years old so I was a little afraid of how the puppy would react with him. Saber arrived about 2 PM and all has been fine after they all got to know each other again, or for the first time in the puppies case. Saber is a good dog and just finds a corner to lay in or hangs out outside in the side yard when he is here. Since he is old he does not like to be bothered and is very set in his ways. The sun is now out and it is getting very humid. We are likely going to get some big storms later this evening because of the warm front the moved in today in Milwaukee. Think I might just lay back and watch some TV the rest of the afternoon or take a short nap. I have not slept well this week, not sure why, but would feel much more awake if I got a better night's sleep. Not sure what I will make for dinner since I am never hungry on a Friday night from having a big lunch with the guys. We will most likely stay home tonight with the dogs and be in bed early. Saturday we have a car show to go to plus our tenants, who cut down trees for a job, are going to trim the big tree in the back yard this weekend. Tony and I will most likely help. Other than that not much going on. Next weekend is Pridefest here in Milwaukee so I am really looking forward to that. Tony and I have fun at Pridefest and spend most of the weekend at the lake front at the festival. Also the air show is going on that same weekend along the Milwaukee lake front. The planes will start practicing the middle of next week which means they will go over the house as the practice. The Blue Angels are the best. Very loud, but so cool to watch them do tricks and fly so close. Also next weekend on Sunday is the big block party the next block over so next weekend is filled to the top with excitement here in Milwaukee.

June 1, 2010 Tuesday Night

Where did the weekend go?

It was for the most part a very nice Memorial Day weekend in Milwaukee. Saturday we did our usual drive along the lake front of Milwaukee in the Cadillac. We no longer put the top down due to the fact I just can not take the sun anymore on the Atripla. Saturday night we sat outside with the dogs and enjoyed the nice weather.

Sunday morning I was waken at 6 AM to the loudest thunder I think I have heard. Looking out the windows it was sunny out. Got out of bed and went outside to see the storm. It was the weirdest thing. The sun was out and there was one dark cloud to the west that was making all the noise. About a half hour later it poured rain for about a half hour. Went back to bed and the dogs let us stay in bed until close to 8 AM. Made some eggs, bacon and toast for breakfast. Took another drive along the lake front in the afternoon stopping for an ice cream cone at the end of the drive. Made some steaks and corn on the cob on the grill with a nice salad for dinner. Made ourselves a drink and went across the alley to sit with the neighbors in the nice evening weather. Took a lot to get Tony away from the TV. At one point he looked at me when I told him we need to be more sociable with the neighbors and said 'do I have to put pants on' as he was in his underwear. Too funny. Yes, I made him put pants on and we sat with the neighbors for about an hour laughing. Watched a little TV and went to bed around 10:30 PM.

Monday was a cloudy day and rained in the morning and later in the afternoon. Was at least warm outside and was not a total wash out. Went to the grocery store in the morning to buy some burgers and chips to take with us to a friends house for an afternoon cook out. At a couples house we have our Friday lunch with. Was about 10 of us and we had a nice lunch and conversation. Enjoyed the drive home from Racine. It did rain a bit on the way home. Was exhausted when we got home so after feeding the dogs we sat back and watched TV for the night.

This morning I had a dental appointment at 10 AM to get a tooth drilled and filled. Jeez, I hate the shots. Once the shots are done I am fine. Before and during the shots I am a mess. Got home and left again to drop off some DVD's I made for my sister at her daughter's new apartment here on the Eastside. My sister was stopping by her house so I thought it better just to have her pick up the DVD's there. Made myself some tomato soup for lunch and took a couple hour nap with the dogs. Five dogs and me on the bed. Much more room without Tony, LOL. The last few night we both have not slept well due to it being so hot in the room and the dogs feel the need to stretch out even more to stay cool. Five dogs and two adults on a king size bed is tight. Making some spaghetti for dinner because I just feel like staying home for the night rather than going to the usual Tuesday night car show at Harley Davidson Museum. Will most likely watch the start of America's Got Talent tonight and go to bed around 10 ish. Hope everyone had a nice Memorial Day Weekend.

May 28, 2010 Friday Night

Spent most of Thursday sitting outside with the dogs listening to music. Loaded up some of my old college day music. Ended up listening to some Alan Parson's Project, Queen and the Soundtrack to Les Miserables. I could listen to the soundtrack to Les Miserables all day every day. It is my favorite play and musical. Made a beef roast, potatoes and corn for dinner with a side salad. Watched the series ending to Flash Forward on TV. What a great way to end a show. To bad it is not returning. I would have tuned in next season. Went to bed around 10 PM. Found out yesterday the convict finally got arrested. Guess he took Tony's brother for some checks, cashing them into a nephews account, and withdrew them from the nephews account. Got the nephew for over $5000 so he set him up to be arrested. The story goes like this: The nephew phoned the convict and said he won a stay at a local motel and he should meet him to 'hang out'. When he got there the police were ready to arrest him. So, thankfully, this guy is off the streets and will be behind bars for at least five years to finish his sentencing from his last string of crimes. Plus years will be added for what he did to us and many others. Went to bed around 10:30 PM. Tony and I didn't talk much all night. We had a minor disagreement and it was better to just not talk. Anyone in a long term relationship can relate I am sure. All was fine by today.

This morning I got up and did the morning routine. Watched a little of CNN. This oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico is so sad and such a disaster. The poor animals. It is heartbreaking to watch the damage. If I lived closer I would be helping to clean the animals coated in oil. Drove to the bank and did a little grocery shopping before picking Tony up for lunch with the guys. Had a great lunch with the guys with lots of laughs. I am so glad I have these guys in my life. Friday lunches with them are sometimes the highlight of my week. That sounds sad, but it is not. Got and answered an email from a follower this morning. I love getting emails from you guys. Thanks for taking the time to be a part of my daily life. Spent the afternoon listening to the three TV show Glee volumes I have on the computer. Glee is such a fun show. I do enjoy the duets where they mix up the song the most. Tonight when Tony gets home we will make some burgers on the grill and watch Wife Swap and some DVR shows. We have a couple weeks of TV to catch up on.
The big Memorial Day Weekend is here. We have no plans which is fine with me. Have to go to Home Depot some time this weekend and buy a new ladder. Will buy a much sturdier one this time even if it cost a little more. On that note, I am typing with two hands although some keys feel painful to push. I still can not close my hand completely and the bruising is still pretty bad on my side and legs. We do have a car show we will probably go to some time early tomorrow. Other than that I just want to spend time with Tony and the dogs outside in the side yard I have taken so much time to make into my little paradise. Wish you all a Happy Memorial Day. Keep smiling. Keep emailing me. Keep following. I would love to hear any suggestions you may have to 'spice' up the sight.

May 27, 2010 Thursday Morning

Spent the last two days recovering from the fall from the ladder. I am slowly getting better but still in a lot of pain and probably should have gone to the hospital or emergency. It is amazing how bruised the body gets the day after such and accident. My side, legs and arms on my left side have bruises. Big bruises. My left hand is still so swollen I can not even get my watch around my hand to put it on my left wrist. I can not close my hand or hold anything that has weight. I can move my fingers a little but with pain. I am still putting ice on it during the day and taking pain pills and motrin to help with the pain and swelling. It is not easy to take a shower or do regular things. Thank goodness it is my left hand and not my right since I am right handed. Going to take it easy again today since I can't do much with it anyway. Typing even hurts.

Haven't commented on this season's TV final shows so here is what I have for you on the ones that were memorable:

V - Was an interesting ending for the season. I do like this show and will continue to watch it next season. I still think the week before episode where Anna says 'break her legs' was classic.

Grey Anatomy - Great two hour show. I was at the edge of my seat the whole two hours.

American Idol - Stopped watching a couple weeks back. Still kept up on what was happening. Hope next season is better.

Lost - This was the show I looked forward to most. I loved the end show but still am confused on a lot of issues. I think I will have to go to some blog spots to get different perspectives and still try to get it all straight in my head. So they all died? They were dead? I am so confused.

Dancing With The Stars - I love Derik. I was glad he and the Pussy Cat Dolls lady won. Looking forward to next season when it starts again in September.

Flashforward - Even though the final show is on tonight and the show has been canceled I will still watch it. I did like this show. Sorry to see it not be renewed next season.

May 25, 2010 Tuesday Morning

Typing with one hand and in a lot of pain.

Yesterday morning after Tony left for work I began working outside on the deck again making a covering for the top deck. About 2 hours into the project I was standing on the top step of the 8 foot ladder when it slipped out from under me and I fell hard. I fell to the deck and on top of the ladder. I laid there for a while in pain and then crawled to the telephone to call Tony at work and ask him to come home. He raced home to find me on the floor, bleeding, cut, and in a lot of pain laying on the floor on a blanket. The first thing I said to him with all the blood was 'don't touch me'. I felt like I was going to pass out. I was in so much pain I stayed on the floor for about an hour. We contemplated calling an ambulance or going to emergency. Tony wanted to take me to emergency. I simply kept thinking if I go to emergency the first thing I will have to tell them is that I am HIV+. That alone made me not want to go. I fell right on my left wrist and my hand and wrist swelled up to the point where I still can not move my fingers or wrist much a day later, and the pain is horrible. I hope I did not break my wrist. Since I can move it slightly I think in time it might be ok. Time will tell. I spent the rest of the day on the couch taking pain pills and Motrin. I can not use or move my left arm or hand at all because of the pain. Went to bed around 10 PM and had a horrible night since I could not find a way to sleep with the pain from my side, legs, arm and wrist.

This morning I woke up in pain. I am black and blue on my side, legs and arms, and my wrist still can not move much. The pain is bad. I still might find myself going to a doctor just in case I broke something. It is very hard to do anything with one hand. Going to take another round of pain pills to get through the morning today. I think I also hurt my shoulders and neck in the fall because I am very stiff in that area today.

I have to comment on a comment from Sunday's post about not going out for a nice dinner for our anniversary. Although it is unfortunate we did not go out for a nice celebration. I have to compare it to a Birthday. As you get older, they do not mean the same. Would I have liked to go out for a nice dinner if we didn't have the kid - yes. But with that said, hopefully this weekend we will. If I had a choice of spending time with my nephew for the weekend or going out for an anniversary dinner, I would choose the nephew. The opportunity does not arise often for us to have him, we can celebrate and go out for a dinner any night now that he is home at his house. So as much as I appreciate the concern for us not celebrating, it is not the end of the world and more important things in life. It does not lessen the relationship or love in any way. Much less, it is not one dinner or celebration that 'makes' the relationship, it is the long term time and trued love that continues. Tony was home in a flash yesterday to help me after I called him after the fall from the ladder. He took good care of me as I laid on the floor in pain. He got me ice, cold compresses and was very concerned to the point of wanting to take me to emergency. It is times like yesterday that makes me glad I have him, not the one day of non celebration of a relationship anniversary. But thank you for your concern, I had Tony read the comment and we will this weekend have an anniversary dinner.

Really hard to type with one hand so I will leave it at that for now. Will write more later to let you know how I am doing. In a lot of pain.

May 22, 2010 Saturday Night

It is Tony and my 17th anniversary of our Holy Union today. We were together four years prior to having the Holy Union. Can't say we celebrated much today.

Friday morning I had to go to the doctor to get my second of three shots for Hepatitis A and B vaccination. The power went out prior to leaving so I could not open the garage door so Tony had to come home from work and drive me there. By the time we got home the power was back on. Talked to Tony's sister who was coming into town and worked it out so we could have Anthony, Tony's 6 year old nephew for the weekend. So I headed to the grocery store to buy kid friendly foods for the weekend. Got home, unpacked the groceries and headed back out the door to pick Tony up to go have lunch with the guys. Had a great lunch and within a half our of being home Tony's sister called and said she had made the three hour trip from Illinois and Anthony and her should be at the back door soon. Tony's sister dropped off Anthony and we spent the afternoon playing. Tony got home around 6 PM and after they both showered we went to Burger King on the Southside to get an Iron Man Toy and then go to Toy's Are Us and spoil the kid a bit. Of course Burger King did not have the Iron Man toys like they should and since Burger King was right next to KMart we went there instead of Toy's Are Us and bought the kid a new pair of shoes since all he had was flip flops packed, $70 worth of Toys, and some other household items. Stopped of at Grandma's house for a little while and then headed back home. Oh, did I mention he brought his little dog named Buddy. So now we also have 6 dogs running around the house for the weekend along with the 6 year old nephew. Watched a little TV and we all went to bed around 10:30 PM. His little dog loves me and spends every minute with me. Although he didn't know if he should sleep with me or Anthony in the spare room so the dog spent the night going from bed to bed every hour all night long.

This morning we got up, ate some cereal and after I showered we went to the Milwaukee Public Museum. Anthony wanted to go to the 'big peoples museum' which is the Milwaukee Public Museum. Spent a few hours at the Museum and then came home for a while before we all got in the 1965 Cadillac Convertible and drove around the lakefront. Even though it was close to 70 degrees the fog was constantly coming in from Lake Michigan. I kept telling Anthony it was the Fog Monster. We then parked and walked the long pier to the end and back. Came home and watched a little TV before I made corn dogs and mac and cheese for dinner, his choice. What a great anniversary dinner for Tony and I. Like I mentioned in the beginning, it is our anniversary today. Guess we will celebrate with a nice dinner next weekend. Right now we are just watching TV. I think we are all exhausted, including the six dogs, all on the couch with Tony and Anthony. Sunday we have a car show we would like to go to. Correction, Tony would like to go to. That is in the air depending on whether we have to drive half way to the Illinois border to exchange the kid and dog with his mom / Tony's sister. I do love having the nephews at the house when ever they can come for the weekend. After 21 years together it is nice to have a distraction for the weekend. Plus, for some reason, him and his older brother, who we helped raise prior to the sister moving to Illinois, love their uncle Dave and Tony because we spoil them rotten when they come to visit. Like a good uncle should.

May 20, 2010 My Side Yard

I thought I would take you on a tour of my side yard. I have put a lot of work into making it my little place to get away. Hope you enjoy the video below.

May 20, 2010 Thursday Morning

Tuesday I spent the day working around the house. The weather here in Milwaukee is getting much better. In the 70s this week and suppose to be in the 80s this weekend and through next week. So nice to have the windows open and get some fresh air in the house. Tuesday night we went to the Harley Davidson Museum for the weekly car show that is every Tuesday night. Had a burger and soda at the car show for dinner. Came home and watched TV for the night. Watched Lost and V. Was so made during watching Lost. The cable went out and had no picture for about 15 minutes until it fixed itself. Jeez, its the second to the last episode. Went to bed around 10:30 PM.

Wednesday I got up and after the dogs were fed and Tony was off to work I showered and headed out the door to get some things done. Picked up food for Barley at the vet and then headed to Walgreen's to pick up a prescription. Stopped off at McDonald's for a Bacon Egg and Cheese Bagel. Got home and was tired so I laid down for a while and took a short nap. Spent the afternoon playing with the dogs and enjoying the nice weather outside. Last night we went to another car show in Hales Corners. Had dinner at the Mexican restaurant the car show was held at. Had a nice dinner. Came home and watched TV until we went to bed around 10 PM.

This morning I got up, fed the dogs and got Tony off to work. Have all the windows open since it is already in the 70s and it is only 8 AM. Now I sit here wondering what I am going to do for the day. I am starting to wonder how long I can continue this way not working or having an outlet to leave the house. I am starting to feel a little worthless and need something to spark my mind. Wish I could find a part time job that would not cut into my social security. Sitting home every day is not always fun. In fact it can be very boring. Not having anything to do except clean the house is not a way to make a person feel needed or appreciated. But what can I do? Volunteer work? Not much in part time jobs here in Milwaukee that pay 'under the table'. Will take a shower and hope something comes my way or it will be a very boring day again today.

May 17, 2010 Monday Dinner Time

Friday I had lunch with the guys. Great lunch. Spent the afternoon cleaning and such around the house until Tony came home from work. Made soup and sandwiches for dinner. Watched a little TV at night and we were in bed by 10 PM.

Saturday Tony worked most of the day at his auto body shop getting cars finished that should have been finished Friday at closing. I went to the local pet store and bought a hair trimmer for Vito. A pet hair trimmer that is strong enough to go through his thick hair. After Tony got home from work we groomed Vito and then watched TV for the afternoon since it was not a nice day in Milwaukee. Made a pizza and salad for dinner. Around 7 PM the manager of a restaurant here on the Eastside called to ask Tony if it was alright if an employee named Jerry pays for food with a company check. HELL NO! Jeez, this guys never stops. I wish the cops would just find him. We told the manager to take his order and we would be at the restaurant when he picked up his food and tried to pass one of Tony's company checks. Well the guy then decided to wait and order later, I am not sure if he caught on being on hold so long while the manager talked with us at home. Jerry never did end up ordering food but it makes us wonder how many company checks he might have. I wish this guy would get hit by a bus or at least arrested for his warrant. We stayed up until about 11 PM waiting for a call but finally went to bed when no call came.

Sunday we got up and after reading the morning paper and feeding the dogs I made eggs, bacon and toast for breakfast. I then got the idea to make a canape for the dogs outside so they have an area to go out and pee when it is raining and not get wet. Yah, I know, I am nuts. Only a dog lover like myself would understand. Tony and I went to Home Depot and bought the wood and glass panels I would need. Unloaded the car and started working on my project while Tony watched. I don't mind so much. He helps when I need the hands. I just like having him around. Finished and got one coat of paint on the frame of the canape. That was enough for one day. Spent the night watching TV. Brothers and Sisters was good. Sal I guess is HIV+ from the way the show ended. Have a hard time watching shows when the topic is AIDS and HIV. Hopefully next season now that he found out he is HIV+ the show will go into telling the story of what a person goes through after finding out this horrible news. Went to bed shortly after 10 PM.

This morning after getting Tony off to work and a little done inside the house I headed outside to continue my canape project. Put a second coat of paint on the frame and secured the glass panels. Then headed back to the hardware store for a little more wood to finish the trellis above the frame. Spent the afternoon working on it. It turned out great. I will upload pictures and put them on this post. Making a frozen Lasagna and salad for dinner and will spend the night watching TV. My muscles hurt. I think I over did it a little. But the pain feels good. I am alive.

May 14, 2010 Friday Morning

Wednesday night I went to a meeting at a local restaurant for HIV. The topic was 'After the diagnosis'. Was informative. Got home and watched a little TV before going to bed around 10 PM.

Thursday I got up and after getting the dogs fed and Tony off to work I recorded 4 more 8 mm tapes to a DVD for my sister. It is a slow process. I got the mail prior to going to my ARCW board meeting. Saw a letter from my mom and dad in the stack. Opened it to find a note that said 'Mom and I said if we sold the Florida condo we would share some of the money with the kids'. And a check for $5000. WOW. Talk about putting a smile on my face. I called them right away to thank them and tell them it will go in the bank saving for a rainy day or dog emergency, and Thanked them over and over. How nice hey? I then had my meeting from 12:30 to 2:30 for ARCW client board. I am part of the Client Advisory Board. I feel it is my way of giving back for all ARCW does for me. Had a good meeting and discussion. Stopped off at the bank and grocery store on my way home from the board meeting. Got home and continued the DVD making as I watched TV. After Tony got home he started telling me about what a terrible day at work he had for the day. One good news was our health insurance which has been on hold was approved again for another year. Always scares me when this comes up as an issue. Of course now the bad news is he had to pay 2 months worth of premiums which came to $2800 just to catch up on the payments so we have no gap in coverage for the two of us. He continued that he had a couple customer complaints, parts not showing up, and then on top of all that he found out that his lover prior to me has AIDS and has about 6 months to live. I guess the brother of the ex came in for an estimate and told him the news. They had a bad breakup and Tony has not many good memories of their 3 years together prior to us starting to go out. Even so, no one likes to hear that news. Especially me! Put a damper on the night. We started talking about the fact that 'every lover he had in the past has died of AIDS'. I at one point had to say 'and now me'. I saw this look in his face like he had forgotten I was HIV+. It took me off guard. I know I don't look sick, but I still live with this disease. I do have to do a little research. Is it possible for someone to be HIV+ and not show it? Not test positive for it? Yet pass it on to others? What are the odds that every lover including me he has dated is HIV+? He has tested negative every time. I am glad for him and would never wish this on anyone, still it is an interesting question? Spent the rest of the night watching TV and went to bed shortly before 10 PM. Had a restless night, I am sure it was the news of someone near death because of having AIDS.

Today I got up and after getting the morning duties finished and Tony off to work I began the DVD process again. Hope to get 2 sets of 4 tapes converted today. That will still leave me about 40 8mm tapes and 10 DVDs to make. Like I said, a slow process. Having lunch with the guys again today. Always enjoyable. The sun is finally out today. Haven't seen the sun in a week. Hopefully it will get at least in the 60s today. No plans for tonight.

May 12, 2010 Wednesday Morning

I have been so busy transferring VHS tapes to DVD I haven't written in longer than I wanted.

Saturday Tony and I spent the afternoon at my parents house for Mothers Day. We had a great time but had to leave by 3 PM to be home by 4 PM because the ATT service person would be at the house between 4 PM and 9 PM to fix the TV DVR that stopped working. In fact we had to watch TV from antenna which sucks. The repair guy showed up about 4:30 and gave us new boxes and everything seems to be working good. Was happy to get it fixed so we could DVR Betty White on Saturday Night Live. She was so good. I love this lady.

Sunday morning we got up, read the newspaper, showered, and headed to Tony's mom's house to take her out for breakfast for Mother's Day. Had a great breakfast. After dropping her off at her home we went to Best Buy to buy more DVD cds and cases for the transferring I am doing for my sister. Spent the rest of the afternoon on the computer and watching TV. Went to bed around 10 PM Sunday night.

Monday I had nothing on my schedule so I spent the day continuing to transfer VHS tapes to DVD cds for my sister. Took a long afternoon nap and made a big dinner for Tony and I. Watched Dancing With The Stars and Castle, then in bed by 10 PM.

Tuesday I had an 11 AM dental appointment to have my teeth cleaned and checked. Damn, one cavity. Made an appointment for June 1st to have it drilled and filled. I HATE the drilling and filling of cavities. Came home and continued the DVD making. Got all her VHS tapes transferred. Now I have to work on the little 8 MM tapes she has which will be a bigger project. My sister gave me about 40 8 MM tapes to transfer. These will take much more time. Made dinner and watched TV the rest of the night. Was a cold, rainy day in Milwaukee. Not a good day at all. Had a hard time making it through the day because of the damp cold cloudy rainy weather.

Today I have no plans except to continue the DVD making for my sister. Cloudy, rainy and still cold in Milwaukee. Not a good day to leave the house. Have a meeting this evening on HIV to go to. Should be a nice dinner also since it is at Mo's Steak House.

May 7, 2010 Friday Dinner Time

Met some friends at a car show on Wednesday night. On the way to the car show the Parole Officer for the guy scamming us called and Tony had a long talk with her. They scheduled a meeting for Friday morning. As of Friday afternoon she still had not met with Tony.

Thursday I spent the day getting a lot done outside the house knowing the weather was not to be good on Friday or this weekend. In fact the weather report says snow on Saturday night. YUCK.
Went to the copy store to make copies of the 8 parking tickets the scammer got with our car as well as other documents so Tony can give them to the Parole Officer. Bought some breakfast and dropped off Tony part of the paperwork and some food for him at his auto body shop. I then came home for a bit before leaving again and going grocery shopping. Came home and unpacked all the groceries. Called Quality Candy at Bayshore Mall to see if the Mother's Day Chocolate Covered Strawberries I order for my mom each year were ready for pickup. They were, so I got back in the car and drove to the mall and picked them up. Spent the rest of the afternoon doing laundry and cleaning before Tony got home. Found out today the scammer even took Tony's nephew's laptop, jeez, it just gets worse. Then Tony's sister dropped off a bunch of binders of his paperwork she had. Went through it, unbelievable. In his work search binder he had a letter of recommendation on made up Downtown Auto Body stationary with Tony's signature recommending him for auto body jobs. Tony had never wrote this letter. Also had a bunch of Tony's pictures from the phone albums he has in his lobby area. I figure to pretend HE did the auto body repairs in the photos. Tony went to his apartment last night at 11 PM to see if he was hiding out there, or even had the nerve to return to the apartment. He would have had to get another set of keys since we have his keys. He was not there. Not sure where he is hiding these days but we will find him and call in his arrest.

Today is cold and rainy. Met the guys for lunch and came home and watched TV that got lost when the DVR broke this week. Got caught up on Lost, V and The Good Wife. Those were the important ones. I am mad CBS doesn't have the last to episodes of Cold Case which I missed and could be the last of the show since it might be cancelled. Will miss Cold Case as much as I do miss Without A Trace. Another show that should never have been cancelled. Making quick food for dinner tonight and most likely will not leave the house and go out in the rain and cold. Tomorrow we are going to my mom's house, Sunday Tony's mom's house to say Happy Mother's Day to them both. We are good sons.

May 5, 2010 Wednesday Dinner Time

Tuesday I spent most of the day doing a little work around the house and napping. Very tired all day. Then last night we got a call from Tony's sister stating that her son has been harboring the employee we are looking for the took Tony for over $5000. So we got in our car and went to the nephews apartment to find out the story is true. Jerry has been staying at the nephews apartment since last Friday when a warrant for his arrest was issued. Tony was so mad I thought he was going to beat his nephew. We ended up taking every piece of clothing or any belongings of the employees with us, including his apartment keys where he has an apartment a block down the street. So we took the keys and went to the employees apartment. Since we had keys it was not like we were breaking and entering or anything. Ended up rummaging through his apartment looking for anything he might have on Tony or anyone else to scam in the future. Took anything of value including his TV. Trust me, he didn't have much be we need to make this guy hurt bad. Spent an hour staking out the apartment before we called it a night. By the time we got home around 11 PM Tony and I were both so hyped up we stayed up until about midnight before going to bed. Not sure were the employee ended up going for the night, but we are on his trail. He even has changed his cell phone number, which we now have the new one.

This morning I woke up to Tony sitting in the living room with the TV on, no sound, and a big red x on the screen. Had to call AT&T for a service call. The guy showed up around 11:30 for his 8 to noon appointment window. He reset the converter box and we thought everything was OK. I then went to Walgreen's and came home to the 'x' on the screen again. So I had to call AT&T and get the guy out to the house again. This time he had to reboot and we lost everything I have DVR'ed for the past two weeks. Lost, V, One Life To Live, Cold Case, CSI's, Good Wife, to name a few. I am so mad. Now I have to find these episodes on the net and watch them prior to next week. I hate this about DVR's. The service people are like computer techs when they tell you you need a new hard drive and everything you have is gone, then think it is no big deal. As we all know, it is a big deal. Took a half hour nap and now just waiting for Tony to get home so we can go to a car show in Franklin and have dinner. Meeting some friends at the car show. No word on the convict / employee today. We are still on the case and Tony plans on going to the Clerk Of Courts office this week yet to file charges against him.

May 3, 2010 Monday Morning

Had a great lunch with the guys on Friday afternoon. After lunch I headed home after doing a little grocery shopping and continued to transfer VHS tapes to DVD for my mother and myself. Tony got home late Friday night and we spent the night watching TV, going to bed at 10 PM.

Saturday was a very nice day in Milwaukee, close to 75 degrees. Worked on the pond and cleaned the house while Tony worked on moving the 1965 Cadillac Convertible out of storage in the back garage. Started right away and after he took it to the shop to check the fluids we went for a long ride along the Milwaukee lakefront with Stella riding in the back of the car. She loves going for rides. Stopped off for a short walk and an ice cream cone and then headed back home along the lakefront. Got home around 3:30 and Tony took a nap while I continued burning DVDs. Saturday night we went out to dinner at Hinterland, a fancy restaurant, because we had a gift certificate from a friend. I had a hamburger, Tony had Dan Dan Noodles with Pig Tails ---- YUCK! I couldn't believe he tried it. In all honesty I took one bite, it was not so bad. Was glad I ordered the hamburger because there was not much else on the menu I would even try or dare to eat. I do not try new foods. I do not like mushrooms. I am very picky about what I eat or try to eat. Got home around 8 PM and spent the night watching TV and burning DVDs.

Sunday was another great day in Milwaukee. After I made breakfast we spent a little time around the house before going for another drive in the Cadillac, this time without a dog. Stopped off at Tony's sister's house for a short visit and then headed home. Tony spent the rest of the afternoon watching a little TV in between naps. Made a little dinner last night and we were in bed by 10 PM.

This morning I got up, beautiful day again. In the 70s. After feeding the dogs and getting Tony off to work I started doing a little cleaning and now started burning Tony and my VHS tapes to DVD. I have 10 of them so it will take some time. Probably have them done by the end of the week. Going to make myself some tomato soup for lunch and most likely take a short nap.