March 4, 2009 Wednesday Afternoon

Having a much better day today than I did yesterday. Didn't sleep great last night but got up this morning and after Tony left for work I stretched and excercised for a half hour. Wow am I out of shape and weak. Thank god you guys couldn't see me cause I looked worse and was more tired afterward than my 98 year old grandma prior to her death. It felt good to get the blood flowing. I then got going on my daily chores and even cleaned the front porch. Had a bagel for lunch and tryed to take a short nap but just couldn't sleep. I am tired, but for some reason I am not tired enough to fall asleep. Thats ok. It is probably for the best. I have to build my strength so I can make it through a full day. In fact this Saturday, being Tonys Birthday, we are going to a car museum in IL. We are meeting my sister and her kids at 10 am and spending the day with them. I am a little scared and still might cancel. I just don't know if I have the strength since it will be a full day of walking and being with the nephews. But it is Tony's Birthday so somehow I have to find the strength. I can sleep in the car on the hour and a half drive down there and back at the end of the day. I just have to put on a happy face for my sister and kids for a full day. I will be exhausted by Saturday night. Hopefully a good exhausted. Weighed myself today and I am down to 164. I just keep losing weight since I have no desire for food. I can notice the difference in my face and waist. Heck, even my shoes feel bigger. Can you lose weight in your feet? So far I've lost 25 lbs since the beginning of the year. Not really trying to lose the weight, just not eating like I use to. Tonight I have my weekly HIV meeting. Gives Tony some alone time with the dogs while I am gone. Today is better than yesterday, not great, but better than I had hoped. Better is better. One day at a time. If I could just not feel so tired and weak.