May 26, 2009 Tuesday Late Afternoon

Not having one of my better days today. Woke up with stomach problems which have persisted all day. So damn tired I just want to sleep. Laid around most of the morning until I forced myself to take a shower before lunch. Made myself tomato soup in a bread bowl for lunch. Was back in bed before 1 PM this afternoon. Had to force myself out of bed around 3 PM. I just can not get my mind and body going today. Cloudy today in Milwaukee which is not helping. While I was sleeping Tony came home to get his shop vacuum. When I woke up this afternoon around 3 PM in the middle of a very vivid dream about seeing Tony around the eastside of Milwaukee walking into a store (yah, I know, I have no control over these crazy dreams), I had to call Tony and ask him if he was really here while I was sleeping. I honestly could not tell if he was actually here or it was part of the dream I was having during the nap. I have had an entire cup of coffee and I still can not get my mind to work. In fact typing this blog is a real challenge. I think I make a spelling mistake on every 5th word or so. Wow, now that I think of it, I think my mail order pharmacy called while I was sleeping to find out if it was time to refill my Atripla. Wow, that memory just hit me now. I think it happened. I will have to call the pharmacy or give it more thought when I am done with this blog. This is how bad my mind is on this damn Atripla. So, I can either die, or have a foggy mind most days like today. It is almost like being stoned but not as fun and a lot more frustrating. I try to tell people not to call me between 1 PM and 3 PM daily because that is nap time and trying to hold a conversation during or a little after the nap is hard. I did manage to vacuum this afternoon. Did a quick job leaning on the furniture around the house as I did it. Making some kind of frozen lasagna for supper along with salad and bread, that is if I can get myself some energy. I am writing this post now rather than later tonight since I hope to do nothing else but watch TV after dinner tonight.

I have ONE cigarette left. Yes, ONE! Saving it for after dinner tonight. Started out the day with only four left in the pack. Scattered them out during the day today. Hung my 'you can do it' signs around the house for mental support this afternoon. It is happening. It must. It must. It must. Tomorrow morning I will wake up and put on the nicotine patch. Hopefully start painting the outside of the house to keep me busy and not kill a dog or someone in the first few days. (suppose to rain all day tomorrow) I have been putting this off quiting smoking and making excuses since January. No more excuses. Trust me, I will not be pleasant to live with for the next week. Poor Tony and the dogs. I will keep you informed on the number of times and people I piss off or piss me off in the next week. Get ready. LOL I find it best not to leave the house when I am trying to quit smoking. Not fair to subject others to my problem, much less they sell cigarettes on every corner bar or gas station around here.

Not happy about the Supreme Court decision on California Proposition 8. But at least the lucky few that got married can stay married. I still just don't get it. If you don't agree with gay marriage, don't marry someone who is gay or of the same sex. Simple as that. I hope one day Tony and I can legally get married before one of us dies. That would be my one last wish.

The dogs are all siting at my feet looking up at me. It is 5 PM and time to feed them. I will keep this feed open and finish it in a bit just in case I remember something else I want to pass along.

An hour has gone by. The dogs are fed. Tony is home and has already eatin his salad, now just waiting for the lasagna to finish baking. I know I have in the past mentioned this rabbit that eats the seed that falls under the front bird feeder. Have not seen it for over a month. But last week a baby rabbit has shown up. Every day we see him. We never had rabbits till this spring in the yard. The baby rabbit is so cute. I have been throwing carots and bread in the area he lives to help feed him. I think he lives under the back end of the 65 Cadillac that is in our front yard. I will try to get a picture of the cute little rabbit someday. I am surprised only one baby rabbit. Don't rabbits have more than one baby? How many babies does a rabbit usually have? And where is the mother or big rabbit that use to come by daily in March? Just saw the baby rabbit run into the neighbors yard and past where I can see him. Bad rabbit. If I see him squashed on the street I am not going to be happy.