May 6, 2009 Wednesday Night

Woke up with the stomach/bladder pain so I called the doctor right away and made an appointment for later in the day. Laid around most of the morning till I finally showered and got to my 1 PM meeting at ARCW. Was a productive meeting. One guy leading the meeting is such a handsome man. Stopped off at home for a bit till I headed to the doctor. Sounds like I have an intestinal infection and was given Cipro Antibiotic for it. Have to take it twice daily and not with any dairy products or vitamins. Here we go again. Change my life. There goes my morning bowl of cereal with my daily vitamins. Have to go back to my daily McDonalds breakfast, LOL. Was a nice day weather wise in Milwaukee today. Rain drops here and there, but for the most part it was partly sunny and almost 70 degrees.

I talk to a friend I worked with till last August on the telephone this afternoon. Was told some interesting news. I guess everyone at my past place of employment is aware of this blog. I had only told two people at my past place of employment about this blog. I do not beleive either one of them passed it on to anyone there. I am wondering how they all became aware of it. When I started this blog and decided to be completely honest about what was happening in my life, I realized at some point people I had worked with or know might some how come across this blog. People I might not choose to tell of my diagnosis. These people will know who I am talking about as they read this about themselves. From day one I always thought since 'I put myself out there' with this blog I would take the hits as they come. Tony has always agreed with my decision and stood by me 100%. Today I was told my blog is 'all over' the place I use to work at. That 'everyone knows about it'. I don't want this to sound negative towards a business that gave me 4 1/2 very rewarding working years. I still have very good thought towards most of the people I worked with. I am still not sure how I feel about my blog being 'all over' VICI. My first thoughts were hurt and fear. Then I had to remember why I created this blog. So that others in the same shoes would know they are not alone in what they are going through. I was bothered by this for a while. I then thought 'oh well'. I soon called Tony to see what he thought about it. His response was 'if they cared about you they would spend more time reaching out to you than they have passing on the blog to each other'. Hmm. I have to agree. If people I worked with have been reading this blog, people I considered friends, why haven't they emailed or called. Maybe fear? Maybe not knowing what to say? Maybe they now don't want anything to do with me because they are not educated enough about this disease? Maybe they were never friends to begin with? I don't have the answers at this point. All I can say is that if anyone was to reach out to me I would be grateful. I am always happy when I receive emails like the two I received today from people touched, helped or educated from reading my blog. It has made it all worth while. One thing I have learned since January is who my friends really are. So I will continue to write this blog honestly. Let the chips fall as they will.

Wasn't going to go to my Wednesday night group meeting tonight but got a call a half hour prior to it from the guy who usually runs the meeting that he can not make it. He asked if I could make sure the room is opened and run the meeting. I had always told him I would. So I did go to the meeting. There was a new person at the meeting and it was heartbreaking to hear his story. Hopefully we were able to give him some perspective. Going to bed shortly after finishing this blog. Love seeing the pointers on the interactive sign-in map on my web page. Keep them coming.